When I'm a little old lady

Then I'll live with my children

And bring them great joy

To repay all I've had

From each girl and boy.

I shall draw on the walls

And scuff up the floor;

Run in and out

Without closing the door.

I'll hide frogs in the pantry

Socks under my bed,

Whenever they scold me

I'll just hang my head.

I'll run and I'll romp,

Always fritter away

The time to be spent

Doing chores every day.

I'll pester my children

When they're on the phone

As long as they're busy

I won't leave them alone.

Hide candy in closets,

Rocks in a drawer,

And never pick up my clothes

From off of the floor.

Dash off to the movies

And not wash a dish.

I'll plead for allowance

Whenever I wish.

I'll stuff up the plumbing

And deluge the floor.

As soon as they've mopped it,

I'll flood it some more.

When they correct me,

I'll lie down and cry,

Kicking and screaming,

Not a tear in my eye.

I'll take all their pencils

And flashlights, and then

When they buy new ones,

I'll take them again.

I'll spill glasses of milk

To complete every meal,

Eat my banana and

Just drop the peel.

Put toys on the table,

Spill jam on the floor,

I'll break lots of dishes

As though I were four.

What fun I shall have,

What joy it will be

To live with my children....

The way they lived with me!

Author unknown