"Square meals often make round people."
-E. JOSEPH COSSMAN

"It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supremarket express lane."

-JUNE HENDERSON

"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he ususally has a son who thinks he's wrong."

-CHARLES WADSWORTH

"Nothing in fine print is ever good news."

-ANDY ROONEY

"The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form."

-STANELY J. RANDALL

"If it weren't for the fact that the TV set and the refridgerator are so far apart, some of us wouldn't get any excercise at all."

-JOEY ADAMS

"As for butter versus margarine, I trust cows more than chemists."

-JOAN GUSSOW

"I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up."."

-TOM LEHRER

"If your friend won't lend you fifty dollars, he' sprobably a close friend."

-UNKNOWN

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