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Blinded I see
The moment Before
The life which was me
And much, much more

Mere seconds that pass
Seeing that which I wanted to forget
An eternity it does last
Reliving so much, without regret

That brief moment, me
My mind afull
I need to flee

Yet, no future to come
No existence to postpone
A loss to some

For I will be free


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2


I am only limited by the walls of my existence
I cannot reach further than a brick in that wall
I could try to make a view
By grabbing a brick, take it out and pulverise it
But what good is that view
When the experience to be on the other side of the wall
Is so much more
What good is that view
When all the bricks are made out of glass
Fragile only because they exist
And they exist only because I exist
Yes I exist for I am
am I?


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3


We are all but flies
On a huge pile o' dung
Floating through space

The really ironic part is
We are so deeply stuck in the shit
We can't fly off


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4


Why do I want to be a camera?
Having no limbs of my own
Yes I know that

I can but see

What do I see
Are you wondering
Not?
Truly, I do not know myself

To see what I see is like an
Obsession to find out

Being the instrument at
Exploring the curves

Alas, I am fooling myself

'Cause I'll never be
A camera
Maybe the artist
Experiencing the view
Rather than being the view
Alas, I am fooling myself



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5


Alone I stand
Tens and tens of people
Making noise, doing things
I see you
Everyone freezes
Everything's quiet
I want to do something
I want to say something
Helpless I stand
Braveless I am
Why can't I?
can I?
you?


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6


Went to America
Got rich
Came home
Suddenly I had friends


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7


Walking down the street
Around me cold, tall buildings, so clean and neat
Listening to the noise, sound made in the past
Kittens purred but their youth didn't last
Memories of what all was left behind
As I'm walking, the sound weakens and fades away
Nothing but silence, the noise of a different kind


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8


the most common dream....

People staring at me
One with dislike, others with delight
Dreaming I wasn't nervous
I think of them naked
Unexpected nightmare, so I wake up
Making a good performance


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9


Butterflies...

How can I say
The things I feel
When you turn my mind
Just like a wheel


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10


If I were to
Know what else
Wherever it would be, for
It is somewhere, it
Lives out there
Hanging on to
It's own reality, for
Else it would not be
Real to itself
Not real to me
If it knows this and
Everything knows it
Then why is it not here
Zoro would be
It's name I guess
Jumping to the rescue
Never to let me be a slave


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11


Just say nothing
And let me drown in your eyes
Just be
And let me enjoy the view
What else can I do
But to love you


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12


These things in the darkness
I can see they are
Not meant to be
Disturbing the whole
Silence in the dark
Deafening sounds that are
My thoughts


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13


I could've been something else
A flower, yearning for warmth and light
A bird, drifting away on the winds
A cloud, touching everything with my reflection
A rock, standing still and emotionless
But I am already all of that and even more


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14


Dazed, confused and saddened
I cry for thee
Nothing began, or it had already ended
I cry for me

Lack of experience, of knowledge
Unaware the pain, the hurting
My lack of courage
My morals failing

The void, the coldness
I wanted that to end
The gap between us

You were drifting away
Yet we found one another
And are here to stay

And for that, I am gratefull


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15


Resting within my den
Content with what I have, for
I bring the light
I let the water flow
I burn the air

No more does my body need
and yet
An instinct awakens in the dark

Scaring me with my failings

And thus resulting in
A need for something
A need for someone
A need for completion

For my soul is not whole
and yet
My thoughts wander away

If only.. for
I have no focus
I have no dreams
I have no soul at my side


And I yearn so much to be complete


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16


Do you not see?
Ever since I've been what I am
I see the eyes within my eyes
The face behind my face
I cannot deny me
This facade is needed no more
Except to mislead, to prey
I will be known
Yet I will not


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17


Have to get
Need to
Afraid
Alone


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18


My soul is like a riddle
Creeping up behind me
Looking back I do not see
I do not know what it is
I'm not in touch
Perhaps time will tell
And I'll find the key to the puzzle
Getting out of this puddle
bursting my bubble and revealing itself..
not sure..


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19


Sadness struck me
While I was happy
While I was with friends
The cold struck me
While it was warm
While it was hot
My feelings struck me most of all
While I was emotional
While I was with you

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20


Blessed with ignorance I was
Chilled to the bone though
Melting ice by mere presence
Alone I suddenly fell
Safely into the warmth
Happiness I can offer
My love


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21


The creepy feeling
Nothing there
Nobody aware
Defeaned by the invisible force
Sight lacking
Tender touch
Relieing the pressure
-P O P-


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22


Have I known
Was it there
I haven't changed
Did I
Did I know
Feel
I'm the same
Even more
Yet less
As if not whole
As if there's missing
Something
Someone
And only when confronted
Crawling into my mind
Stirring
Saddening me
Sleep
Forgotten dreams
I will heal
If only
With your thought


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23


Amongst equals
Amongst strangers
Here I breath
Waiting
Looking at the time
Passing by
Crawling
Looks and sight
Noises strange
Always heard


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24


Feeling alone and isolated
Fearing all which lays ahead
Sweet words whispered
Gentle touches felt

Things of which I noramlly melted
My joy would normally spread
All that just dissapeared
As with whipping of a belt

The cold is creeping up to me
Despite my efforts of warming
My sight is fading untill I cannot see

The void below is calling
I never realised I jumped
All left is mere falling


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25


Where to start explaining
When all logic seems to be fading
When I can only think of you
When I don't know what to do

Failing to see the logic
From within I feel sick
For I am missing you
Feeling the way I do

Why must I wait this long
When only I alone can see but a glimpse
When I know where I belong

Fleeing a scary and lonely reality
For right now it is
For we were meant to be


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