| ENLIST NOW |
| Help us rack, ruin, defile and destroy peacful restrooms. Let no man look at another urinal without recalling the terror that we bring. |
| First, you need to go out on your own and assult a urinal or a sink. Then send the picture of your dirty deed, with all the necesery information: date and location. And to prove your mettle, tell us what method you used and any close calls that you had. Also be sure to include the proper profile information. We will then give you a rank and assign you a name, unless you want your own specific name, and give you your first mission. If you want to start a chapter of fecal warriors in your local area then sign up asap. |
| RANKS PAWN 1 completed mission JOKER 5 completed missions ASSASIN 10 missions, atleast 8 succesful VETERAN 15 missions, with atleast 10 being succesfulC ACE 25 missions, alteast 20 succesful sions E AWARDS BROWN HEART getting caught in the act SHARPSHOOTER 5 succesful missions in a row without getting caught LEGION OF MERIT getting caught in the act, pinching it off, taking a picture and making a clean getaway . MEDAL OF HONOR awarded only to the bravest of brave, who commit themselves to a selfless act of guts and glory by walking into a crowded urinal, releasing the beast and running like hell. |
| TOOLS OF THE TRADE |
| This is where you willl find all you need to know about technique, terminology and fecal matter theory. |
| PART 1: How to lay a bomb There are two primary way to take down a target: overt and covert. The covert method is much easier and less stressful. All you have to do is make sure that nobody is around, then tag the urinal, take a picture and make a clean exit. Obviously the overt method is a tad bit more difficult, but not impossible. If sombody else is in the restroom, you just gotta make sure that they are around the corner or tucked away in another stall. Then lay your cable, get the photo and your good to go. Wiping is another matter. Running away isnt fun if you have a steaming hot brownie smeared all over your ass. So after delivery it is good to retreat into the safety and comfort of a stall and do a little behind the cheeks cleaning. *NOTE: Dumping in sinks is pretty much a hate crime against latino janitors. PART 2: Methods of delivery There are three main ways to get the goods to the target. The first and simplest is to seal it off in a bag back at home then when your at the desired location, open the ziplock and drop the log in the pisser. That is called packing heat. Second is the direct input method. Just as it sounds, you hover 2-6 inches above the rim of the urinal and let em rip. Last but not least is what we like to call the swoop. Definitly the sneakiest way. When your already on the can you simply crap onto some waded up toilet paper and when the time is right sneak out of your stall and insert your stinky meatloaf into the mission objective. You can also combine this with direct input. It is best to get a stall right next to a urinal. |
| PART 3: What to say and how to act Always remember, stay calm. If sombody walks in and you already dumped in the urinal, just act surprised. Maybe pop off a joke about it. "Those are some hardcore gull stones." If you get caught, just think of somthing clever and witty like, "Well you dont expect me to crap in one of those toilets do you? Have you seen how dirty they are?" You can always pretend that you mistook the urinal for some kind of european ass cleaner. Just remember, get the picture at all costs. If worse comes to worse, tosing poo onto a surprised bystandard will gaurantee they will stop to clean it off before chasing you. FECES IS A WEAPON. |