SIGNS SEEN
 
On a Plumbers truck:
We repair what your husband fixed.
 
On the trucks of a local plumbing company in  NE Pennsylvania:
Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.
 
Pizza shop slogan:
7 days without pizza makes one weak.
 
At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
Invite us to your next blowout.
 
Door of a plastic surgeon's office:
Hello. Can we pick your nose?
 
On an electrician's truck:
Let us remove your shorts.
 
In a non-smoking area:
If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.
 
On a maternity room door:
Push. Push. Push.
 
At an optometrist's office:
If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.

On a taxidermist's window:
We really know our stuff.
 
In a podiatrist's office:
Time wounds all heels.
 
On a fence:
Salesmen welcome - Dog food is expensive.
 
At a car dealership:
The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.
 
Outside a muffler shop:
No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.
 
In a veterinarian's waiting room:
Be back in 5 minutes.  Sit.  Stay.
 
In a restaurant window:
Don't stand there and be hungry.  Come on in and get fed up.
 
In the front yard of a funeral home:
Drive carefully.  We'll wait.