PRACTICE EARTHQUAKE SAFETY

Earthquakes can strike without warning, and being prepared for such a disaster can mean the 
difference between life and death.  Here are some tips to help you and your loved ones make it 
through a quake:

-Those living in areas not prone to earthquuakes can respond quickly to the plight of disaster 
victims in quake zones by complacently smirking and saying, "I told you so."
-To minimize loss and damage in a quake, trry not to own things.
-Practice your burrowing-out-from-under-40--tons-of-rubble skills ahead of time.
-Look out your window often. If you see a llarge, zig-zag-shaped crevasse moving rapidly from the 
 horizon toward your home, step either to the right or the left.
-For those who fear earthquakes, it may commfort you to know that a majority of the damage during 
 the 1906 San Francisco earthquake did not come from the tremors themselves.  Instead, it was 
 from the raging, out-of-control fires that consumed most of the city.
-A doorway is the safest place to be duringg a quake. Eat, sleep, and work in doorways.
-Be sure to mail your house-insurance paymeents a full five business days before a major 
 earthquake strikes.
-In the event of a quake, get under somethiing heavy, such as a desk, a table, or your boss.
-If you are caught in a major earthquake inn Southern California and are part of the entertainment 
 industry, take a moment or two to reflect on how grossly you've wasted your life.