'Twas the Night Before Christmas...In Da Hood'

Wuz de nite befo Crimmus,
And all ower da hood,
ereybody wuz' sleepin',
Dey wuz sleepin' good.

�We hunged up our stockings,
An hoped like de' heck,
That old Santa Clause,
Be bringin' our check.

�All o'de fambily,
Wuz layin in de beds,
While Ripple and Thunderbird,
Danced through dey heads.

�I passed out inna' flo,
Right nex to my Maw,
When I heard sech a fuss,
I thunk: "It mus be de law!!!"

�I looked out thru de bars,
What covered my doe,
'spectin' de sheriff,
Wif a warrent fo sho.

�And what did I see,
said, "Lawd look at dat!!"
Ther' wuz a huge watermellon,
Pulled by giant warf rats!!

�Now ober all de years,
Santa Clause, he be white,
But looks liken us bros,
Gets a black Sanna dis nite.

�Faster dan a Po'lees car,
My home boy he came,
He whupped on dem warf rats,
An' called dem by name!

�On Leroy, on 'Lonzo!
And on Willie Lee!
On Saphire, on Chenequa!
Dey wuz a site to see!!

�As he landed dat watta' mellon,
Out der in da skreet,
I knowed it was fo' sho!
Da damndest site I ebber did see.

�He didn't go down no chimbley,
He picked da' lock on my doe,
An' I sez to myself,
"Sh*t!! He done dis befoe!!!"

�He had dis big bag,
Full of prezents I 'xpect,
Wid Air Jordans and fake gold,
To wear roun' my neck.

�But he left no good prezents,
Jus started stealing my sh*t,
Got my drugs, got my guns,
Even got my burglar's kit!!

�Wit my stuff in de bag,
Out da window he flewed,
I woudda' tried to catched him,
But he stoled my 'nife too!!

�He jumped on dat wadda' mellon,
An' whipped out a switch,
He wuz gone in a seccon',
Dat son of a b*tch!!

�Next year I be hopin',
Anutha Sanna we git,
Cuz' diz here Sanna Clause,
Jus' ain't werf a sh*t!!!

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