HARD RAIN
A film review by Steve Rhodes
Copyright 1998 Steve Rhodes
RATING (0 TO ****): *
One night, during a torrential downpour that flooded the streets,
we went to see -- what else -- HARD RAIN.
"So, are we all going to die?" the Sheriff (Randy Quaid) asks in
the story's opening line as he evacuates his flooded town. The answer
is pretty much yes, but not nearly soon enough. And to add insult to
injury, the supposedly dead, regretfully, often turn out not to be so.
Populating this bad TV-movie-of-the-week material are a host of
talented actors. One can only hope they were rewarded handsomely for
acting in this hopelessly muddled picture. Besides the obvious
hardships of acting most scenes while dog paddling in the water, they
will all receive black marks on their records for appearing in this
dismal movie.
Graham Yost's script serves up one cliche after another for the
actors, who thankfully managed to mumble quite a few of the lines.
Director Mikael Salomon's staging is so confusing that you may have
trouble figuring out what is happening. The befuddled presentation is
exacerbated by Peter Menzies, Jr.'s dark and ugly cinematography.
The plot concerns an armored car that gets stuck in the raging
water. Onboard are guards Tom and his Uncle Charlie. Christian
Slater, who is much better in his tender roles as in UNTAMED HEART,
plays Tom. Edward Asner drops by briefly to take on the role of the
soon to be dead Charlie.
Coming to their "rescue" is a gang headed by Jim, played on
autopilot by the great actor Morgan Freeman. He views the loot, three
million dollars worth, as his retirement plan.
The entire movie is one big watery chase with the Sheriff and his
posse tracking Jim and his gang, who are in turn after Tom. Along the
way, Tom picks up a love interest in the person of a crucifix-weapon
wielding woman named Karen, played in a totally wasted performance by
Minnie Driver.
The action sequences are repetitive and without much interest.
They do feature lots of explosions and gunfire to keep you awake.
Christopher Young's emotionless score for the film has a single trait,
ear-shattering loudness.
The plot holes are as big as the ones in the dam that breaks,
submerging the town. The characters have an infinite number of bullets
and rarely do they have to bother reloading their guns. The weapons
and the ammunition spend most of the time under water or being rained
on but always fire perfectly. When one of the bad guys drops a gun
into the water, it stays in the same place until much later when Tom
swims to get it, even though the swift water is so strong it is
uprooting large trees. Counting these improbabilities is one of the
more enjoyable ways to spend your time as you wait for the characters
to kill each other.
The show has a single, but unprintable, good line. Betty White
plays an incessantly bossy wife, and, when her hen-pecked husband
finally told her off, our audience roared with laughter.
The show concludes with a sickening set of twists. The best that
can be said of the picture is that it is merely stupefyingly awful as
opposed to laughably bad.
HARD RAIN runs 1:37. It is rated R for violence and would be fine
for teenagers. (The two families behind us shockingly had a half-dozen
preschoolers among them.)
Have I seen this movie: Yes
And what did I think: I liked the concept of this movie, a town is decimated by a flood while a band of thieves are out in it to rob some money. howver, this movie ends up rather wet. It isn't boring and has a lot of action, however the story and the characters are rather weak. Morgan Freeman and his band of merry men are out to rob armored car driver Christian Slater and his partner of money. Slater hides the money so Freeman searches him out. Meanwhile Randy Quaid who plays a corrupt sheriff serving his last days learns of the money and can't refuse taking it for himself. I didn't really like the characters here, for one thing, I don't like seeing Morgan Freeman playing the bad guy here, even if he does still have some heart. Minnie Driver plays the female lead here and like a lot of movies, gets into trouble and the hero has to save her. Christian Slater gives an ok performance, but nothing that memorable. The film's message here is an obvious one, what people won't do for money, and the rain represents the ominous doom coming. The film's waterlogged scenes do present for some great looking cinematography, so it does make up for the lack of story and character development. This film isnt that bad, and it will hold your interest, just don't go looking for any kind of a classic here. It probably would have been better off to be strictly a disaster film or an action film, not a blend of both.
I give Hard Rain 2.5 out of 5 stars
Review written December 17, 1999.
