In My Own Little World
Part 4
'CUT IT OFF'. That's what was written on Emily's locker. She knew that it was pertaining to her hair. A good portion of the 'popular' clique amused themselves daily by telling her to "Cut it off!". She ignored them. She had more important things in life than a bunch of bully girls yelling at her to do something she never would. She didn't even like to get her hair TRIMMED. Emily went through the day like she always did. The happy girl. The bitchy girl. The easily-angered girl. The smart girl. They were all her. But there was one side of her that most people didn't know. The easily saddened girl.
Almost every night, Emily would listen to music. She would always put in the same five Cds, then simply put the CD player on 'shuffle' and would be in whatever mood the music was for the rest of the night. Sometimes, she got something happy, or hyper, or confident. Usually though, she got something sad. She never changed the CDs, and she never even considered it. She didn't usually like change, because in her life, change was usually for the worst.
On this particular night, Emily had just finished e-mailing her friend. Her friend was having some pretty bad self-esteem problems and often came to Emily for advice. Emily didn't mind helping her friends or listening to them vent. She was their unofficial psychologist. But she had problems too, and who's there when the psychologist needs psychologist? Her friends tried but couldn't help. At least not her friends in THIS world....
"Emily? What's wrong" a New York accent asked gently. "Shaun..." she mumbled. "AGAIN? Man, he must have really upset you. Want to talk about it?" "Not really..." "Ok, then. Want to go see if Cye's down at the stream?" "Sure!" Emily brightened up. Rowen always knew how to cheer her up. He even knew how much going swimming with Cye and him reminded her of the times when she was young and used to go swimming with all her friends. They raced each other down to the stream, laughing the whole way. "No fair!" Emily panted, grinning at Rowen. "You always win!"
About two hours later, the two were talking as they walked back to Mia's house dripping wet. "So, you've been having problems lately?" Rowen asked casually. Emily knew that he was worried about her. "Yeah," she said," but nothing major." "Er, Valentine's Day is coming up. Have you got a date?" "No..." she sounded depressed again. "Besides, if I had a boyfriend, you'd be the first one I'd tell," she added. He gave her a hug. "Good. Then I can go beat him up for stealing my little girl!" he teased, just like a big brother. "Oh my--!"Emily suddenly stopped right in her tracks and tensed up. "What?" Rowen suddenly looked alert. She shook her head. "Nothing. It's just I...I felt something. I think you gave me a static shock, you meanie!" she suddenly grinned again and started chasing him down the path. He laughed as he easily outdistanced her, but let her catch him anyways.
The next day, Emily sat on the school bus. She'd been having a particularly bad day. everything had gone wrong. And just when she'd thought things couldn't get any worse, she'd seen Shaun walk by with his cousin's female friend, and when Emily had turned on her Walkman to escape the world, the song had been "Crazy", the part where she sings: "That I'm not wastin, my feelings on you,". She was about to burst into tears. She wasn't even in the mood to go see Rowen. She just wanted to listen to her music and be content. She closed her eyes (but didn't go to the Other World), ready to just sit and almost sleep, when something happened.
Something was there for just a moment. Emily didn't know what or who it was. It didn't assume and shape or form. It didn't make a sound. But it was there. It was the feeling you get when you're very, very sad, and the one you love comes up behind you and hugs you. It wasn't the feeling of an empty hug, but a hug that really means a lot to you. More than any kiss could ever mean. And Emily knew, she just KNEW that Rowen had somehow found his way into her world for just a precious moment.