X-ENTRIES

Moira McTaggert

Entry #U350LT

Begin Recording ...

It seems strange to be sitting here, alone. I think ah'd gotten used to the old chit-chat of the at Kitty, Meggan, the elf, or that crazy old Scots claiming to have heard Lockhe

I feel sorry fur mahself. I know I shouldn't, after all, they're just gone on a mission, something abpout retrieving Peter and Meggan from Arcade, or something like that. Well, they knew ah'd be ok, it's not as if they don't worry about me. I swear, Kitty fuzzes more about me than anyone I kow, wid the possible exception of Rahne.

The old clatter of the rain against the lab window suddenyl wakes me up from my reverie. It seems I'm really allone, to be hearing these sounds.

Loneliness is a dangerous state. Now I remember everything I've lost, from the very first days. Charles. Kevin. Even Sean.

---- Ah... I said I wouldn�t worry about it any longer. I�m a little grown up to be jealous of something like this, but I still remember the last time I talked to Sean, and asked his feelings about Emma. He couldn't say, God bless the Irish, he wouldn't lie to m and say it was nothing.

It seems only fitting that, walking thru my lab, I'd end up here. Mutant X i n big, black letters. Nice pseudonym for my son

God, Kevin, why did you have to be so powerful, people would fear you so much? I remember reading once that the loss of a son is somethig you never get over, no matter what. Seems there's no truer words.

Before Onslaught, I used to wonder how Charles did it, how he released his anger and pain at Legion's death. Now I know, too bad for me I can't go on a rampage to destroy the world, and make it pay for the death of my child. And why shouldn't they pay? They branded him a mutan, they turned him into a desperate creature, biding for love, and trying to murder me. My God, I miss him, miss his lovely blue eyes, his soft voice telling me "Ah love you momma!"

It's funny where your steps will take you when you're not looking. This is the very spot whre Cable saved me from falling machinery. I know, it's changed a bit since then, HE's changed a lot since then, but that innate goodness I first saw in him, is still there.

I wish I could gather the courage to ask Scott if he's proud of his child, if he's treasured as much as he should the second chance he's got at him.

I'm glad the rest of Excalibur isn't home right now. Nobody did know how a human would die of the Legacy virus. If a mutant's powers overload, what would happen with a human?

Now I know. I'm sick to my stomach, and on the verge of losing conciousness. The floor seems cold and hard against my body, but I'm gradually losing all feeling. I hope Kitty isn't the one to find me like this, and I wish I had written a last note to Rahne.

Kevin, I'll be with you tonight

THE END

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Lestat

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