Copyright © 2000 Duncan Cook
Welcome to Paul Green's Quickfire Crap - The Haven of many a bad joke (I apologise in advance - these jokes are highly poor - so poor in fact, that I refuse to print any more jokes from the unfunnymeister himself. However, jokes that are even vaguely funny will probably be accepted, so email me, or...not.) If you would like your jokes posted here (subject to inspection) email [email protected] with your jokes!Paul Green's Quickfire Crap
Don't be suprised if you don't find these jokes funny - They came from Paul Green...
NB - Highlight the Answers to see them better!
1. Why do bald men have holes in their trousers?
- So they can
feel their hair!
2. What do you get if you stick your hand down
a mystic's knickers?
- Your palm red!
3. Where does Saddam Hussein keep his CD's?
- In Iraq!
4. What do you call a Sleeping bull?
- a Bull-Dozer!
5. What's red and squirms in the corner?
- A baby with
a razor blade!
6. What's blue and screws old ladies?
- Hypothermia!
7. When does Michael Jackson know it's bedtime?
- When the big
hand touches the little hand!
8. What would it take to reunite the Beatles?
- Three Bullets!
9. Why can't blondes dial 911?
- They can't
find 11 on the keypad!
10. How can you tell a blonde waitress is confused?
- She's got a
tampon behind her ear and she doesn't know what she did with the pencil!
11. What do you do if an elephant comes through
the window?
- SWIM!!!
12. How do you know an elephants had sex in
your garden?
- The grass is
flat and the bin-liner's missing!
13. Why were traces of cheese found on Michael
Jackson's Penis?
- Kids'll do
anything for the taste of Dairylea!
14. Why do blondes wear knickers?
- To keep their
ankles warm!
15. What's white and sticky and slides down
the wall?
- GeorgeMichael's
latest release!!!
16. Why did the blonde get sacked from the
M&M factory?
- she kept throwing
out all the W's!!!
