Aristotle: To actualize its potential.

Roseanne Barr: Urrrrrp. What chicken?

George Bush: Read my lips. No more "chicken" jokes.

Rhett Butler: Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.

Julius Caesar: It came, it saw, it crossed.

James Carville: It's the economy, stupid!

Bill Clinton: It crossed the road once, but it didn't inhale.

Andersen Consultant: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held a park-like setting, enabling and creating an. impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

Howard Cosell: It may very well have been one of the most astonishing events to grace the annals of history. An historic, unprecedented avian biped with the temerity to attempt such an herculean achievement formerly relegated to homo sapien pedestrians is truly a remarkable occurence.

Charles Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically predisposed to cross roads.

Charles Dickens: Tis a far, far better road than chicken has e'er crossed before.

Bob Dole: Get off of that road now! It's Bob Dole's road. Bob Dole built it, and Bob Dole's gonna cross it. Bob Dole's not gonna let any chicken get in Bob Dole's way.

Bob Dylan: How many roads must one chicken cross?

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: The chicken did not cross the road .. it transcended it.

Robert Frost: To cross the road less traveled by.

Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken 2000, which will both cross roads AND balance your checkbook.

Gilligan: The traffic started getting rough; the chicken had to cross. If not for the plumage of its peerless tail the chicken would be lost, the chicken would be lost!

Grandpa:In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

Hamlet: Because 'tis better to suffer in the mind the slings and arrows of outrageous road maintenance than to take arms against a sea of oncoming vehicles...

Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its pancreas.

John Paul Jones: It has not yet begun to cross!

Martin Luther King, Jr.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

Martin Luther King, Jr.: It had a dream.

L.A.P.D.: Give us five minutes with the chicken and we'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.

David Letterman: And the No. 1 reason -- fricasee!

Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the princely chicken's dominion maintained.

Marcel Marceau:

Groucho Marx: Chicken? What's all this talk about chicken? Why, I had an uncle who thought he was a chicken. My aunt almost divorced him, but we needed the eggs.

Eddie Murphy: To get to the f------ other side.

Ralph Nader: Because the crossing guard was asleep on the job. We need a new program to make our interstates safer for people and poultry alike. H.R. I-80, introduced in the Congress this morning, takes the first needed step in that direction.

Alfred E. Neuman: What? Me worry?

Sir Isaac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest. Chickens in motion tend to cross the road.

Richard Nixon: I'm glad you asked me about that. This is what I have to say about that. My wife Pat and I only eat good, Republican chickens. Cooked in a good, Republican pot. Hey, is this (expletive deleted) mike live yet?

Richard Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

Noah: Because the Ark was on the other side.

Oliver North: National Security was at stake.

Obi-wan Kenobe: Because the force was with it.

Frank Perdue: It takes a tough man to chase down a fleeing chicken.

Plato: For the greater good.

J. Danforth Quayle: Ite sawe ae potatoe.

Ronald Reagan: I don't remember.

Colonel Harlan Sanders: It couldn't have been one of our chickens. KFC always delivers.

Arnold Schwarzenegger: He'll be baaack!

Jerry Seinfeld: Why do they call it a road anyway? Who knows it was a chicken? Maybe it was a duck.

Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?"

Rod Serling: Picture if you will...A chicken so desperate to get to the other side that it ventured out of the bounds of safety and into...the Passing Zone.

Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!

William Shakespeare: To cross or not to cross, that was the question. 'Twere not nobler to suffer the slings and hatchets of outrageous executioners -- far better to take flight against a sea of troubles, and by crossing end them.

O.J. Simpson: To escape my tireless quest for the real killer.

Oliver Stone: The question is not "Why did the chicken cross the road?" but is rather "Who was crossing the road at the same time whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

John Sununu: The Air Force was only too happy to provide the transportation, so quite understandably the chicken availed himself of the opportunity.

Mr. T: If you saw me coming you'd cross the road too!

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

The Warren Commission: There was one chicken, and it acted alone.

Bruce Willis: A chicken's gotta do what a chicken's gotta do.

Windows 95: In this version, we bring the other side to the chiclsjd$##.&///%%^^

Oprah Winfrey: NEXT, live and exclusive -- roosters who fly the coop and the hens they leave behind!

Henny Youngman: Take this chicken ... please.