The San Francisco Clowder
(March 20-22, 2000)
by Talisker Pippin
by Talisker Pippin
Well, here we go agin. Sherry our Hoomin announced that she was going to San Francisco, gonna wear some kittens in her hair ... okay, okay, she didn't ware enny kittens. But she sed she was going to fly away to Catifornia agin, and this time she would git to meet Auntie Beth, who belongs to Jaeger an Sheba an Ebony in Singapore. An Auntie Ricky from San Diego who belongs to Newton and Winnie (Newton led da Great Cadbury Hunt, an hosted one uv da furst RPC partees at his howse after da Cadbury Hunt!). An she was gonna stay wif Auntie Kate, who sends us Finn's Spayshullist Nip, which is da bestest sallid inna werld. (Sometimes Skye gits a liddle silly when she rubs her face da Finn's, but she nefur letz herownself looze control if ennywun is watching; me, I eet sallid.)
Auntie Beth was arriving in San Francisco on Sunday, an on Monday she an Unka Tony were gonna go be tourists in San Francisco. Auntie Rosemary was gonna meet them an be a tourist too. But our Meowmie couldn't leeve Seattle until Monday day, so she hadda miss being a tourist in San Francisco. Instead, she took da plane to San Jose, den caught da train to Redwood City where Auntie Kate lives. But da plane was ofur an hour late in Seattle, so she spent lotza time inna airport. But she figgered since she wuzn't at werk, an hadda gud buk to read, it wuz okay. An when she got to San Jose, it wuz sunny an warm, an that wuz furry okay. (Except Auntie Kate had gone to meet Meowmie atta train station to surprise her, an then she didn't git offa train she wuz spozed to be on. Or the next one. Or the next. So Auntie Kate went home an Meowmie called her frum da train stashun -- an when she saw a big white van wif two bigbig dogs innit, she knew it wuz Auntie Kate driving up to meet her.)
Auntie Kate an Unka Kevin have a house fulla eight cats an two dogs. Meowmie had so much fun meeting alla Kate's Kids. There was Paddy (da BIGBIG dog) an Josie (she's a big dog too but not big as Paddy -- but she's still First Dog, Dat's about rite, we fink, cuz she'z da gurl!). An the kitties are Rors, who's orinj an white, an Riley, who's pale goldey-beige, an Sirius, who's white wif spots an a dark short poof of a tail (short tails are da bestest! that's whut I have!), an Celia (who's a roundbrown Siamese), an Heidi, who's a slender tabby gurl, an Siobhan (say shuh-VON), who's a rounder tabby gurl (an who stayed out all night an Meowmie only got to meet her da last morning she wuz there), an Colleen, who's a pritty shy pale calico, an Spooky who's a sealpoint mostly-Siameze who's a Venerable Cat uv advanced yeers. Dat wuz a lotta kitties an Meowmie hadda count on her fingers to remember them all.
Here are some of Kate's Kids:
This is Paddy. He's lying onna couch. He fills da whole couch almost. An he tries to be a lap dog an sit on hoomin laps. Meowmie sez he just gits his behind sorta perched onna lap, an then yew git to scritch it.
This is Riley. He was the first kitty who sed hi to Meowmie
when she arrived.
This is Rors. He sits under the table an watches efurryfing.
This is Colleen. She's on toppa da fence by da squirrel feeder. You can't see her gud in dis pikchur -- it wuz too shady, an den she went onna roof next door an dat wuz da last Meowmie seed her.
This is Celia, right behind St. Francis.
These are Heidi and Siobhan -- one on either side uv da pots.
Da pots are where Auntie Kate grows Finn's Spayshulist Nip.
Auntie Beth was staying with Auntie Kate, too, so when she camed home from being a tourist, Auntie Beth an Auntie Kate an Unka Kevin an Meowmie all hadda gudgud time visiting. But then they all went to bed so they could get up and have more clowder the next day.
An the next day (which was warm and sunny), Unka Tony picked up Auntie Ricky atta airport an they came to get Auntie Beth an Meowmie an go to lunch. Paddy an Josie played inna middle of da hoomins while they said hihihi. That's Unka Tony an Auntie Kate an Auntie Ricky. An Paddy an Josie.
An then Auntie Beth gave packages uv cuttlefishies to efurrywun to take to the kitties. The cuttlefishies are frum Singapore an kitties there like them alot. We got cuttlefishies when Meowmie got home. (Auntie Beth also brot some reely weerd plum candies for da hoomins -- Meowmie ated one an thot it wuz the strangist fing she'd efur had. Auntie Beth said she wanted to bring reel Singapore fud, not just Chinese fud dat yew can git all ofur, an dat da Singapore hoomins reely luv dese plums. Finally Meowmie sed "It's da salt!" The liddle candied plums -- which had dere pits inside, so if yew bit down hard yer teefs wud brake -- were reely reely salty! Dey had licorice an "permitted preservatifs" too. Meowmie wuz happy to haf da experience uv eeting a strange noo fud, but she wuz just as happy to only haf da experience wun time.)
Den Meowmie an Auntie Beth an Auntie Ricky an Unka Tony went to lunch. (Auntie Kate stayed home wif alla kitties an doggies.) Dey went to a hamburger restaurant an had a gudgud homemade barbecued hamburger. An den dey went to Unka Tony's an met Wendel an Gato who we mostly know as Biker Coon. An den dey went to Unka Tony's noo howse dat he's gonna take apart an put bak together agin. An den they went to Auntie KimB's where dey met Hoover! Meowmie got to scritch Hoover's dent, an she thot he was a beeyoutiful kitty. She'd nefur scritched a fayce dent before, cuz she's nefur lived wif enny flatfayced kitties -- Hoover got lotza scritchies frum lotza aunties an he didn't even hide or ennyfing. We wudda hided if our howse had been full of strange aunties.
Hoover, uv course.
Auntie Rosemary wuz there by then, so effurywun went to da Mirassou
Winery which is only a liddle ways from Hoover's howse. Dey all tasted
wines. An den dey bot wines. Meowmie brot home two boddles,
an she bot da leest uv all. Dey bot lotza wines.
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Den dey went back to Hoover's an had wine to drink. Here's Auntie Beth wif her back to da camera, an Unka Tony rite behind her, an Auntie Kim inna middle, an Auntie Rosemary (wif da dark hairs) an Auntie Ricky leenin aginst da wall (wif da yellow hairs). Dey're all standing in Hoover's kitchen.
And den dey went to dinner. Dey ated dinner at a restaurant called Birk's, an Auntie Kate an Unka Kevin camed to dinner, an Auntie Patty (who is winkwinks wif Unka Tony), an Auntie Mary (Muzzincat). Dey ate an ate an ate an dey had stake an roste beef an dey cudn't even eet it all -- so dey put it all in reel doggie bags an taked alla leftofurs bak for Josie an Paddy. An Meowmie didn't bring us nuffin! She's meen.
Alla clowderers had a gudgud time at dinner, talking an laffing an telling stories bout kitties. Meowmie sed dat it wud only be inna groop uv catlovers dat yew could sit atta dinner table an talk about cat poops an hurks an nowun wud fink it was strange or not whut yew talk about at dinner. An efurrywun hadda catpoop story. So dey all had a gudgud time.
An after dinner dey all sed gudbye, an Meowmie an Auntie Beth an Auntie Kate an Unka Kevin went back home an went to sleep.
Meowmie was sorry to leeve Auntie Kate's pritty back garden wif alla
pots an plants an burds an kitties. Here are some more pikchurs uv
da garden, wif kitties anna humming burd:
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An when Meowmie camed home she had a packij of cuttlefishies for us, and a packij of Finn's Spayshulist Nip, but she forgot to bring da fevver toy dat Auntie Kate gaved her for us. Just cuz she didn't know how to bend it so it wud fit in her suitcase an she put da wine in furst an den got bizzy wif dum hoomin talking or sumfing an she just FORGOT. Whut can yew do? Yew just haf to do da best yew can wif da hoomin yew have to werk wif, an sumtimes ours is just hopeless.
But still, Meowmie got to meet Auntie Beth frum Singapore, an that
wuz furry furry speshul. An she met Auntie Ricki too, who she hadn't
ever met before. An got to see lotza frends an spend time inna sun
an eet stake an drink wine. She sez it wuz a gudgud clowder, an since
she wuz only gone a couple days an we didn't haf to stay in prizzin an
she brot nip (even if she forgot our TOY), we're glad to haf her home agin.
--Talisker Pippin, toyless in Seattle
