Unreasonable Eve

 

              Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.  When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights,
              Eve became upset.

              "You're running around with other women."  she charged.

              "You're being unreasonable," Adam responded.  "You're the only woman on Earth."

              The quarrel continued until Adam fell asleep, only to be awakened by someone poking him in the chest.

              It was Eve.

              "What do you think you're doing?"  Adam demanded.

              "Counting your ribs," replied Eve.

           My 4 year old son spilled his cola on the rug the other day, and wanted to clean up the mess himself. So, I told him that the mop was just outside the back door. Quickly, he ran to the door, but realized that it had become dark outside. Suddenly scared, he told me what the problem was. Assuring him, I told him that Jesus is everywhere, even in dark places, and that he'll always protect him. This put a smile on his face! So, he opened the door just enough to poke his head outside and called out "Jesus, if you're out there, could you pass me the mop?"


        A little boy's prayer. "Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we're gonna be in a big mess." 

Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and informed his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. "Fine," said the pleased mother. "If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you." "Oh, I didn't ask Him to help me not misbehave," said Johnny. "I asked Him to help you put up with me."
Dear God,

               So far today, I've done all right.

               I haven't gossiped, and I haven't
               lost my temper.

               I haven't been grumpy, nasty or
               selfish, and I'm really glad of that!

               But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed, and
from then
               on, I'm probably going to need a lot of help.

               Thank you!

               Amen

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