The phrase, Disability
When preparing your list of what you want in a spouse be sure to consider physical and mental health. Would the spouse's disability disallow the candidacy as a spouse? Are certain disabilities acceptable, whereas others are not?
Of course, you may not make these discoveries until after going out with a disabled person. In that event, you may add the item to your list and prioritize it accordingly.
No, it isn't usually so easy to make changes in your list. Disabilities are an exception.
However, don't be too hasty. Are you really disturbed by a different trait or characteristic, and using the disability as an excuse?
You, too, may have a mild disability, such as a limp or a stutter. You may have a more serious issue, such as a congenital disease or a handicap that developed later. You may have a health, familial, or social problem that you would rather not reveal.
Will your date be shocked by this disability on your first date? If so, then it would be wise for the person who arranged the date to clarify this issue in advance. This is not the time for unpleasant surprises.
You may well be able to say that the issue is minor or that it is under control. However, some people are not interested in people with handicaps, and your goal at this time is not to educate strangers about proper behavior.
After all, you do want your partner to accept you fully for what you are. You are doing nobody a favor by going out with them. You have value, worth, and importance, and you want to be treated as an equal by your partner. You don't want your future spouse to look down upon you or to have sympathy for your handicap.
This can be accomplished only be making the partner aware of these issues in advance.
In other cases, you may have skeletons in your closet. Those issues should not be raised before the first meeting.
"Out of sight, out of mind"
was fed into a
computerized translation machine.
The result?
"Invisible insanity"
- Source unknown
Your own disabilities
Invisible insanity
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