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Do you want to be controlled for the rest of your life? Do you want to marry somebody who will control you? Who has learned how to control you and then will do so? Do you want somebody has learned during the dating time how to push the right buttons and then not forget the lessons and will continue pushing those buttons later in order to get whatever he or she wants? No matter how considerate, sweet, pleasant, or quiet the person might be, if the person has won you over by pushing your buttons instead of by exhibiting the traits that you really want, then you are marrying somebody who will control you. If she or he was able to convince you to marry them then they will continue to convince you about other things as well.
This is an important point but it's one that many people ignore or choose to ignore during their dating time.
They find somebody who seems to show that they like them and that person does many things to win them over. People cometimes enjoy when others flirt with them. They like to have people try to say the right things to make them happy or interested or excited.
They often don't realize that those who flirt are really doing something in order to win them over in a different way. They're learning about what makes people react, what makes them respond, and what makes them like them. This traiing period is not going to be forgotten later on. It's an important period in which the recipient does have a good time. After all, he enjoys all of the attention and he doesn't even realize what's really going on behind the scenes. He doesn't realize that the person is learning how to deal with him, how to work on him in the future. This period of flirting does not last forever. It changes.
Now do a little study yourself. Look around at those people who are already married. You will see a lot less flirting, a lot less people working on each other, because they don't have to do that any more. They've already learned. They're beyond that and they now manipulate each other.
Take this situation and see how it compares with the fact that so many married people are not happy in their marriage. They complain about henpecked or dominated by the partner.
What a shame. This was quite predictable. If only they had looked for certain specific traits instead of allowing themselves to be dominated then they would not have been in a position in which the partner would have controlled them.
They created a situation themselves in which they allowed the partner to find the ways that are necessary to control them while they were dating.
Later, after the dating period they then complain that that same partner is continuing to do the same things. The partner is continuing to win them over except that this time it is control instead of flirting.
The procedure is the same, the manner is the same, and the result is different after the people are married and much less happy.
You may want to rethink the situation with someone who tries to win you over. That could be a sign of impending troubles, difficulties, or problems.
You've been warned.
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People who choose their partners are often looking for different things, depending upon whether they are men or women.
Men seem to be looking for women who meet certain external requirements or preferences and they often do not consider or even think about the kind of person that they want sufficiently, as as personality and other attributes.
Women, on the other hand, seem to want to be entertained.
They want a man who will make them laugh or enjoy themselves.
They're all looking for the wrong thing.
A woman who meets a man's requirements based on her physical attributes is going to do what it takes to make the man be interested in her. She is going to develop those physical attributes. If he likes the way she winks at him, then she will wink at him in the way that he likes and in the way that attracts him.
The result, however, may not be what the man wants. The woman learns the things that attract that man and she does those things and then whenever she wants something she uses that ability of hers. She winks at him whenever she wants his attention.
As a result, the man is telling the woman how to control him and he is in effect looking for a woman who will control him.
But isn't that the opposite of what a man should be interested in?
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