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This Sourcebook features Avengers fiction written by Caroline Miniscule. The fiction maintains the flavor of the original programs and is rated G or PG unless otherwise identified. All photos used for illustrative purposes maintain their original copyright and are for entertainment purposes only.

DIANA: The Transcribed Script

A Prelude to EVER AFTER

THE AVENGERS

EVER AFTER

Introduction: This story is not part of The AVENGERS Canon, and it isn't part of my canon either. It's just a fantasy I was in the mood to write. Here's the background:

In 1973, five years after leaving The Avengers, Diana Rigg traveled to the United States to star in the situation comedy Diana. She played Diana Smythe, a fashion illustrator who worked for a department store in New York, and lived in her brother's apartment. The show only lasted for 13 episodes, unfortunately - it was pleasant enough but nothing really unique or memorable about her character or her supporting cast. Which isn't to say Diana didn't display a fine sense of comic timing - it was the writers who let her down. I say this based on the four episodes I've seen.

The highlight of the series was the episode in which Patrick Macnee guest-starred as the famous and successful pianist Brian Harris. He's in love with Diana, and she with him, but his life style is too hectic for her tastes.

From that episode comes this story. Much of the dialogue and action comes straight from the episode. (I appreciate the fact that nobody reading this story has ever seen Diana, let alone this episode, but that's why I've included the transcribed script). My story has touches of Total Recall, The Prisoner, and is perhaps one fitting end to The Avengers.

CHAPTER ONE: I present the transcribed script of the Diana episode. Imagine Diana lovely as ever, not looking much older. Patrick Macnee has put on a few pounds (he�s in his fifties after all) but is charming, with a great sense of timing. Speaks with a slightly higher register, his real accent? and without the clipped tones of John Steed.

CHAPTER TWO will feature the story, EVER AFTER, which gives it the Avengers touch.

 

DIANA

Episode �Mrs. Smythe, You�re Needed�

Diana Rigg as Diana

Barbara Barrie as Norma

Richard B. Shull as Howard

Gino Coforti as Spinelli.

Guest Star Patrick Macnee as Brian Harris

Filmed 1973.

 

 

Diana in department store window, holding a plan of what the window is supposed to look like.

NORMA

ENTERS Hi, Diana.

DIANA

Hi, Norma.

NORMA

Every time I get in one of these windows it's just like being on stage. It reminds me of the time I was an angel in the Christmas play in the third grade.

DIANA

Were you a hit?

NORMA

Not exactly. I whooped on one of the Wise Men. How's it going?

DIANA

Fine. Unless I've got Marsall�s plan upside down. In that case I'm in a lot of trouble.

NORMA

Oh, how's he feeling?

DIANA

Well, he's in the third day of the twenty-four flu.

NORMA

I do appreciate your helping out like this, Diana.

DIANA

I'm glad to help.

HOWARD

CARRYING LARGE WHITE SIGNS WITH BLACK PRINT. Here they are. Hot off the paintbrush.

NORMA

Oh, thank you, Howard. You didn't have to bring them down yourself.

HOWARD

Oh, anything to get out of that office. I'm having trouble writing the ad. Everything I write seems to be phony.

DIANA

What's the ad for?

HOWARD

Fake fur.

NORMA

What is this? HOLDS UP SIGN SAYING DIANA SMYTHE - YOU�RE NEEDED. Diana Smythe - you're needed.

DIANA

SURPRISED. How on earth did he find me?

NORMA

Who found you? Who needs you? What does this sign mean?

DIANA

It means the ghost of London past has come back to haunt me.

NORMA

Well, it's calling card's a family size. Well, come on, let's finish here and go down and risk lunch at the cafeteria.

MAN WALKS ALONG STREET WITH ANOTHER SIGN.

NORMA

Hey, are we being picketed.

HOWARD

That's not a picket.

DIANA

This is only the beginning, friends.

NORMA

So, whose this old friend?

DIANA

Well, it's Brian Harris.

NORMA

Brian Harris. The concert pianist?

DIANA

The same.

HOWARD

The Brian Harris? He's a genius.

DIANA

I'm sure he'd be the first to agree with you.

WOMAN

ENTERS. Is there a Diana Smythe here?

NORMA

Oh, yes. There she is.

WOMAN

This is for you. HANDS ENVELOPE TO HER.

DIA

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