Frank Ochieng is a guest critic who also writes reviews for his own personal website, located here.

To become a Guest Critic for CINEMA 2000, please notify David Keyes.

Review Uploaded
11/15/02

Starring: Eddie Murphy, Owen Wilson, Famke Janssen, Malcolm McDowell, Gary Cole, Phill Lewis
Directed by: Betty Thomas

Frank’s film tip: Director Betty Thomas revisits Bill Cosby and Robert Culp’s old TV stomping grounds by updating the fast-paced but flaky-minded big screen version of the 1960’s television espionage drama “I Spy”. Mission: Not Accomplished

Here’s the million dollar question: has Hollywood exhausted every attempt to revive a classic American sixties television show and bring it back to life in the form of an updated remake for today’s contemporary movie audience? Well, apparently not because the filmmakers found another way of tapping into another TV-to-big screen project from yesteryear. This time, the nostalgic urge was to bring back the Emmy-award winning Bill Cosby-Robert Culp espionage series I Spy and serve it up as a hip and harried actioner for the desired pairing of Eddie Murphy and Owen Wilson. If anything, this derivative action-adventure is just another tired excuse to offer a lax variation of the tiresome salt-pepper buddy-buddy formula. I Spy feels so belabored and is nothing but a frenzied and forgettable action comedy that contributes absolutely no redeeming value outside of the two main stars bantering and posturing without any meaningful purpose whatsoever.

Director Betty Thomas, no stranger to helming sixties-oriented TV ditties from the television prime time graveyard (The Brady Bunch Movie), shows some flashiness and lively attitude in the way she goes about making her version of I Spy one remake that dares to take trivial liberties. For instance, the leads change names and duties in Thomas’s version (Murphy as the black one takes the name of white agent Kelly Robinson while white Wilson dons the name of black agent Alexander Scott). Also, the black agent assumes the role of athlete (Murphy’s a pro boxer in the movie, Culp was a pro tennis player on the television series) while the white agent is the coach/valet. But despite the attempt to adjust these little detailed factors, Thomas doesn’t compensate for the anemic storyline or the shoddy plotting that accompanies this joyless albeit jolting jubilee of gadgets, gorgeous gals, and gunfire. For the most part, I Spy is sporadically funny in its selected manic moments and quick-witted dialogue but the whole concept seems so overdone in showy “been-there-done-that” fashion.

In a way, the majority of this film’s targeted audience (age 40 and under) may not even recall the original I Spy as a mid-sixties NBC-TV program. Or they barely remember it from their childhood (incidentally, this reviewer was in diapers when the Cos and Culp were traipsing around the world in their cool adventures). Flamboyant boxing champion Kelly Robinson (Murphy) is recruited by the US Government to join awkward secret agent Alexander Scott (Wilson) as the tandem try to recover a valued spy jet in the hands of a notorious arms dealer named Arnold Gunders (Malcolm McDowell).

The convenience of snagging the arrogant and motor-mouthed pugilist could not have come at a better time. Since Robinson is in Europe to face that continent’s champion, it would be quite easy for the twosome to disguise their agenda by taking part in the boxing entourage while keeping an eye on the matter at hand-the top secret aircraft and its whereabouts. How fitting that the sinister Gunders is sponsoring the boxing match between Robinson and the European opponent as a clever way of covering his sleazy tracks? Yet his diabolical scheme to utilize the super jet as a bargaining tool for some power-mad country willing to do some major worldwide damage is being launched in the process.

In the meanwhile, the slaphappy union of the bickering duo stumble along the way as they co-exist in cutesy conflicting fashion. Of course the antagonizing Robinson’s ego is something that the klutzy Scott cannot pass up on teasing and testing to the limit. All of this is set against the colorful and chaotic goings-on of furious fisticuffs, bouncy babes, hackneyed henchmen, and wily weapons. Plus, as Robinson and Scott bond with one another under the most hedonistic of circumstances, they have to also contend with other distractions such as the lovely curvy tagalong Rachel (Famke Janssen) who obviously makes Scott’s temperature rise considerably. Also Carlos (Gary Cole) is a rival that gets all the breaks with the ladies that poor Scott only wishes can come so easily to his spy-oriented tendencies.

I Spy tries to go for the jugular vein by incorporating this partner-in-crime comedy caper as an electrifying action-packed feature with stylistic luster. Everything in the film wants to be jaunty and jocular from the movie’s pulsating soundtrack to the swanky wardrobe that Eddie Murphy sports on his sleek back. But this proceeding is merely a petulant popcorn pleaser that offers no genuine thrills outside of showcasing Murphy and Wilson as a couple of outrageous cads mugging for the camera as the noisy narrative flies by in distracting form. The exchange between the garrulous Murphy and the wimpy Wilson is energetic and caustic at times although the tedium is so thick that you can cut it with a knife. To be perfectly honest, there’s no uniqueness or sense of direction that gives this fizzled forum any distinction amongst the redundant action potboilers that make up this ubiquitous genre.

There’s a couple of bewildering questions that need to be addressed. First, why even call this flaccid flick I Spy in the first place? Other than the name recognition that fuels the flame for baby boomer TV addicts, Thomas’s vacuous albeit giddy showcase has nothing truly in common with the sophisticated and witty Cosby-Culp enterprise. This contemptuous product could have been called Misfits in the Making and the end result still would have produced a feeble-minded and uninspired testosterone-induced yarn. Secondly, was it a necessary gesture to have four scribers write this aimless and juvenile script? C’mon now, folks…this screenplay is along the lines of a lame punchline for goodness sake! (maybe it took the same amount of people that penned this movie to screw in a light bulb…don’t you think?).

In short, once you’ve seen the raucous rapport between two devilish dipsticks dodging bullets and personal put-downs, you’ve certainly seen it all before! Hmmm…where’s the needed team of Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan when you really need them?

Frank rates this film: ** stars (out of 4 stars)