This Week's Dear Scabby:
Dear Scabby,
For the
past few months, I have been stuck in my log cabin in Nothern Canada. The
snow is ten feet deep, except for a tunnel I dug from my window to the
nearby hockey field. I used to crawl there and watch them practice, but
now the end of my tunnel caved in, and I left my shovel outside. Kinda
stupid, eh? I can still hear them by putting on my Montreal Signiture edition
helmet and shoving a hockey stick through the rest of the snow. The vibrations
of their voices run along the stick and over my helmet and into my ears.
Pretty clever, eh? But I'm getting bored just listening to them, and my
TV has stopped working, so I can't watch hockey. So I've been reading about
hockey and eating my canned food. I guess you could say it's kinda fun
really, eh?
I guess
I could use my telephone and call for help, eh? But then I wouldn't be
having this much fun and I wouldn't get to write a survival story
later and make millions, eh?
Well,
could you suggest some boredom busters?
Nothing to do in the Northwest Territories
Dear Nothing to Do,
Boy,
you seem to be acting kinda stupid, EH? Write your survival
story now if you've got nothing to do! Use your hockey stick to tunnel
out, stupid! There's probably a hundred ways you could get out of your
house! Fine, it's not my job to criticize... except that you're trying
to rely on others for a situation you brought on yourself! For goodness
sake, take some responsibility for your actions!!! Yes, I know you didn't
make it snow, but you're trying to make me tell you what to do! Sorry,
it's understandable. I was once in a very simiilar situation. I lived in
Hawaii while my parents were hippies, and a volcanic eruption blocked our
entire commune off from the rest of the Hawaiin islands. Luckily we had
plenty of canned Pineapple, and we also had Parcheesi! When the authorities
had finally chopped through the hardened pyroclastic flow, a television
company made a mini-series out of it. This could be a profitible thing
for you after all!
If
you are really stuck for things to do, go to funology.com
for boredom busters.
Scabby May Flower