---DECEMBER'S LAMENTS---
 

 
Thursday, December 02, 1999

     Well, it's officially here...  The most disgusting time of year...  Bleh.  No, I didn't always have this adittude about the Holiday Season.  In fact, I used to look forward to it very much...  No, not for the presents either.  It used to be about love, until everything got fucked up, anyways.  I remember -everyone- (Including very very distant cousins, and people I didn't even know.) would flock to my Grandma's on Christmas Eve.  It was a blast, really.  I even remember one time when  they had a Santa Claus come in for all us kids... Heh, I remember when I found out about the whole "Santa" bullshit thing, I was really heartbroken...  I remember when I was real little, I was sleeping in the living room, trying to catch "Santa" red handed, and I  remember someone stepping on my head, and when I woke up, I thought it was Santa saying, "Shhh, go back to sleep."  It was my "father" though, still, I remember how excited I was because I had a personal Santa experience, heh, it was kinda a shame when the illusion was shattered...  'Course, it always is, like the illusion of the Holidays being based on love and goodwill...
            About three or so years ago, Christmas time was the happiest I had ever been, even though my life was (and still is) pretty fucked up.  This was back when I had a girlfriend, not just a girlfriend really...  She was my first (and probably last) love.  Nothing mattered in the world as long as I had her...  I remember we would just spend hours and hours together outside in the frigid cold with only each other to keep warm.  Awww, how romantic eh?  Sure was...  Too bad it was just another illusion.  I found out later after she had dumped me that she never loved me, I was just an anchor for support in her world gone mad.  Out of everything that has happened to me, that whole ordeal was probably what fucked me up the most.  'Course, watching your girlfriend try to commit suicide with a big butcher knife can do that to a 15 year old kid...  To this day, I cannot talk to anyone of the female persuasion without going all mental.  I've already scared off my more than fair share of girls because of my skittishness.  Oh well...  I don't think Fate has it in the cards for me...*shrug*
            Anyways, don't let my foul mood destroy your "Christmas Spirit".  If your Holidays are going good, then holy shit!  I envy you! }=-]  Happy Holiday's everyone, but I have an appointment, ciao!  *Hops in a truck to go about town caroling Type O Negative's "Red Water - Christmas Mourning"*

Wednesday, December 08, 1999

      Well, an old friend of mine showed up the other night.  A long time ago, he was my best friend, but he had a baby with his girlfriend and they had a life to get on with, so he moved and left me far behind...  Which is understandable, of course.  I hadn't a problem with it (though I kept telling him that if he kept sleeping around he'd eventually get someone pregnant, the blasted dimwit.).  And he would come and visit occassionally...  Only, he'd always need a favor.  Usually money.  He'd like me to do tarot readings for him too.  Nothing new, though.  He'd always been  this way.  But I've begun to realize that perhaps he doesn't really view me as a friend, but someone to mooch advice, favors, and money off of.  In fact, I do believe that is all I am good for to any of the people who are supposedly my "friends".  I am constantly being taken advantage of, though I never think of it that way.  It's no problem to me if someone wants to borrow money from me, or needs a favor done.  Complete strangers even.  I don't know, it's as if I feel compelled to do it.  But apparently, from what I'm being told, I'm just being walked all over upon...  Well, I am not known for taking bullshit, and maybe everyone's right?  Maybe everyone out there is just a selfish fuck looking for someone to take advantage of, I don't know.  Maybe I should stop being so fucking nice to people?  Afterall, I look the part, being a freakish looking gothic, and I seem to act the part by being so distant from people...  Yet I still try to be nice to them, even when they don't care who the fuck I am.  Maybe everyone is right...  Maybe this is just the last bit of naivity that I have to lose...  Or maybe it's the last of my innocence?  No...  I'm still a virgin, I can have that to hold on to when everything else is gone. }=-]  Anyways, I'm in a really bad mood (no shit, sherlock.)...  But I wrote a Y2K poem last night, yadda yadda, here it is:

                                                    -3L3KTr!K s(-)33p-

                                I have a Y2K bug

                                Can you fix me

                                With your MILLENIUM suture

                                Paste me together

                                With your buzzwords

                                And shelter my molten soul

                             In your BOMBSHELTER

                             My gears are rusted

                             Twist my rivets

                             And push my buttons

                             Please help me

                                I have a virus

                             My harddrive CRASHED

                             Make  it go away

                                With your electric kisses

                             1999 ways to DIE

                             I've done them all

                                When the ball drops

                                That will make 2000
 

            Go ahead...  Make my millenium.  Uh, yeah...  Laters.
 

Tuesday, December 14, 1999

      Well shit.  Oh how I hate  this fucking season.  I've been having nightmares lately...  Nightmares of love and happiness.  How is this a nightmare?  Well let me explain to you....  It's all fake.  I'd rather dream of being eaten by 10,000 rabid, three-toothed, one-eyed, six legged mutant leprechauns than have "sweet" dreams of love and content.  Because when I wake, I know that it wasn't real, that I wasn't being eaten by leprechauns, and then think about how funny that is...  But on the same coin, I wake and see that in fact, my father really still is an asshole, and that my ex really didn't love me, and that I don't have a loving person to share my life with... Nope.  I wake up and I'm alone...  Again.
            Well, I guess I missed my "friend"'s b-day...  The one that I borrowed that money to.  Haven't seen 'im since.  No big surprise there...
            My "father" had me print out a bunch of his "poetry" for him so he could send it in to some blah dee blah contest.  He thinks he's becoming a famous poet now...  Feh.  Here, I'll give you a sample of his poetry...  This poem I actually thought was good (albeit meaningless), until he told me what all the metaphors meant...

                                                        As I Recall

                Someone told me not to sleep with flowers

                Yet ever since I don't

                I sleep alone without them

                And yes there were lots of flowers

                But I never had enough time

                Before beloved flower push off from my life

                Like small boats from the shore

                Yes, someone told me not to sleep with flowers

                As the crickets lay hush among the stepping stones

                I make my bed with lilac sheets as smooth as silk

                I lay in the faint fragrance of the flowers

                Smell soft and pale

                Fading until only their names whisper

                Pink lilac mauve

                Yes, someone told me not to sleep with flowers

                So I sleep alone
 

                Yeah yeah, not bad right?   Well, lemme tell you what the sick old fuck told me; Just replace all the metaphoric "flowers" with "prostitute", and you will get the true meaning of the poem.  Yes, that's right ladies 'n' gents, my 48 yr old "father" wrote a poem about fucking prostitutes...  Bear in mind, friends, that this same fellow is the father of 3 other children, besides me, all of whom are under the age of 17, and shouldn't be hearing about 48 yr old men sleeping with prostitutes in the first place, let alone hear their own father write "poetry" about it.  He is sick, sick sick SICK!  He has recently been befriending his own parents, who has hasn't spoken to beforehand for 30+ years...  Why?  Because he want's to make amends?  Ha!  Because he is waiting for his own father to die, hoping to gain an inheritance!  You know how I know?  He told me.  Twisted, huh?  And all this coming from the guy who told me, "Yep, I pretty much got a set place up in heaven.  I really think I'm an angel sent to earth for some reason."  Oh, ye Gods, why did I have to spring from his cursed loins?
            Blah, 'nough 'o' him....  I've been trying to get my Christmas shopping done, it's horrible...  I went to the mall, it is the most frightening thing...  All the shoppers with painted grins, the Santas, the crying children, the ridiculous amounts of money being spent...  And here I am drifting through the crowd, half-asleep, the circles under my eyes so dark that they looked to be painted, my head lolling to either side as I stared blankly at all the faces...  Everyone who laid eyes on me first gasped in disbelief, then did a double-take, then ran away in terror from this... This, ungodly, unfriendly, and ultimately unchristmas-like shambling zombie-esque.... Thing!  Anyways, in any event, I only got done shopping for my sister.
            Well, I 'spose  that's enough for this gripe session...  Oh, my guestbook is working again...  I think...  So sign it or something.  I'm out kids.
 

Sunday, December 19, 1999

    You know...  If I could have it my way...  I would ban all those fucking horse-drawn carriages.  To me, they are a symbol of how much of a loser I am.  Well...  Lemme 'splain;  You see...  For forever and an eternity, I always wanted to take that "special someone" on a carriage ride through town.... Awww, yeah yeah yeah!  Don't think I can't hear you lauging!  So what?!  I'm corny that way, awriiiight?!  Anyways, never did that, never will, 'nuff said....
        So.... What else is new?  Eh, nothing.  I finished xmas shopping...  I ran face-first into a donation sign (VERY bad for my tough-guy persona)...  I rode on a bus...  Yep.  That's about it.  Oh, that little bitch Dave came over last friday.  He showed me this flyer about how some hollywood bigshots needed some extras...  They were going to throw a mock rave, and wanted a bunch of wild-looking kids to show up to be filmed.  Jokingly, (And it was jokingly because I knew that a thou of peeps would show, and I'm not big for crowds) I told him that they would film me if I went with all my "gear" on.  (My "gear" consists of two mesh-metal arm plates, and two shin guard that I safety pin on to my clothes, two big metal knee-pads, a dog collar with chains that run down to a diamond-shaped piece of that mesh stuff, then down to my beltloops, and chains that run down from the back belt-loops of my pants, and the front belt-loops to just above my knee where I have chains encircling my legs.  When you put it all together, I look  like some macabre neo-industrial warrior.) But he got all into asshole mode with me, "Duh!  Dey wouldn't lechoo in!  Dey would jus make yoo go home!  Duh huh huh huh!  Dumbass!".  Why do I have to have "friends" like this?
        You know what else?  I am SOOOO fucking tired of being a "lighter-bitch"!  What's a lighter-bitch?  Well, it's the loser-ass kid who always carries around a lighter for no apparent reason, and you have him light your cigs and you can completely ingnore him.  Anytime I go to clubs, concerts, hang-out with "friends", they just want me to light their fucking cigs an won't talk with me!  "Hey, light me up will ya?"  "Sure...  Here..." *puff puff, blows smoke in face*  "Thanks (if I'm lucky)" *cough cough*  "Yeah sure, hey, did you hear ab..."  "Shut up lighter-bitch".  Gaaaa!
        Not that I go anywhere that I can be a lighter-bitch at anymore, seeings how the only club I frequented fucking went all caddywompus and defunct...  Oh sure, I could go to Area 51 on a Thursday night, but, in all reality...  I'm too afraid to.  There will most certainly be people there that I don't want to run into, (well DUH, two of them are the DJs) I mean...  I mean, I've been blown-off by them all already...  I don't know, I fucked that whole situation up.  I just want to let it die, I don't think I can fix it.  So showing up at that club would prolly just fuck it up more...  I don't go to raves anymore either, though I think that techno is boss righteous, it's the crowd I don't dig.... Well, to be more accurate, it's the crowd that doesn't dig me.  So, I ain't gonna tarry anywhere where I'm not wanted, yuh know.  And  I guess I could always check out the place that the Confetti (the club I formerly attended) crowd has flocked to... That is if the new building didn't suck dirty nuts... Fuck.  Yeah, I'm in a bad mood...
        I was thinking that all 0.03 readers of my webpage might want a little bit more background on myself, so I'm writing up a FAQ... Which is really quite silly, when you think about it.  FAQ meaning Frequently Asked Questions... And no one ever frequently asks me anything... Well except for a FUCKING LIGHT!!!  Gaaah!  Anyways, I'm going to write it up now, and whatever...

Here's my  FAQ

Tuesday, December 28, 1999

                Christmas has come and gone... Last year, my New Year's resolution was to never spend another holiday alone.  Heh, looks like I didn't make good on that, eh?  I'm not making any resolutions for myself this year, though...  I'm just going to continue to pray to whatever gods may be out there, to make a 747 magically appear above my head and fall on me.
                I'm not going to say everything has been bad...  The most unexpected thing occured today.  I got a Christmas card in the mail!  Yes, you heard right!  Someone out there actually sent -ME-, the sorriest loner in the universe, a card!  It's from a dear friend of mine from Canada, whom I haven't spoken to for a good while.... *sighs*  I didn't even send her anything...  I don't deserve it.... *kicks himself in the groin*  I'm gonna hafta get a hold 'o' 'er somehows....
                Oh, guess what I got for my Christmas present?!!?!!?   The FLUUUUUUUU!!! *jumps up and down cheering!*  I started getting sick last Thursday, and I'm proud to say that it's late Tuesdat night, and I'm still quite ill.  }=-]
                Well, New Years is coming....  I am pretty sure about what I'm going to be doing....  I think I'll meander over to the neighbor's house, and steal all they're good alcohol while they're too drunk to notice.  *nods*  Then I'll wander down to the park at like, 4am, so drunk that I'll be off my rocker, lamenting at my lonliness until I cry myself to sleep on a park bench...  Only to have a rude awakening shortly later as a police officer finds me and unleashes his thwacker stick on me with mad abandon...  After he beats me back into unconsciousness, I'll wake up two days later, naked, cold, and ultimately violated.  I guess I'll prolly go back home after that...  Well, that's all if the world doesn't spontaneously vaporize at the toll of the bell anyways.... *shrugs*
                Oh, I was gunna update sooner, but I've been effectively immoble due to my illness.  Anyways, I'm going to hop in the shower...  And weep... *waves cheerfully*

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All works, including artwork and writing are copyright Jed J. Casper (Draconis) and may not be used unless expressed permission is given to do so.  (c) 1999

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