Saturday, August 05, 2000

       Well, it's been awhile between entries... I only made one entry for July, but July sucks ass anyways.  So does August, when I think about it... Hrm... Oh well. *shrugs*
            I've had a lot on my mind as of late...  And that's always a bad thing.  I've once again come to a conclusion that I am only on this Earth so that God will have someone to laugh at.  My life is a tragic play of comedic errors, and I am the blundering fucking idiot star of this redundant show... Specifics?  Fuck that, I don't want to get into it right now...  But it still has the same old familiar theme of my stupid fucked up friend, my fucked up family, my now extremely fucked up love life (But hey, at least I have one now... Sorta... Well... Not really... Oh fuck it.), and just the whole fucking fucked up fucking world.
            I'm so sick of my friend snubbing me, I'm so sick of my family screaming at each other, I'm so sick of things never working out like I want them to, And I'm sick of being sickened.
            I don't know what to do with myself... All my feelings, thoughts and emotions are just a fucking train wreck.  I can't make sense of any of it... All I know is that it's just a fucking stupid disaster.
            Speaking of stupid fucking disasters, due to someone's stupidity, two of my cats have been poisoned.  One cat, Frigga, was poisoned two weeks after she had four kittens, but she pulled through.  And now one of those kittens is poisoned... I seriously doubt it will make it, it was already crippled to begin with in the first place.  And even if it lives, what sort of condition will it be in?  Perhaps death would be preferable...  Of course, these sorts of thoughts probably don't often enter a little kitten's mind... Some say animals are stupid, and don't have feelings.  But Frigga has been looking around for her poor crippled kitty all day...
            You know, I seem to type fuck a lot when I'm depressed.  Which is kind of strange because I rarely ever say it in person...  Just goes to fucking show that you can learn something new about yourself every fucking day, huh?