Last night I played a blank tape at full blast.
The mime next door went nuts!
If a person with multiple personalities threatens
suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Just think how much deeper the ocean would be if sponges did not live there.
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
Whatever happened to preparations A through G?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
I went for a walk last night and my kids asked me how long I'd be gone. I said, "The whole time."
So what's the speed of dark?
How come you don't ever hear about gruntled employees?
And who has been dis-ing them anyhow?
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
I just got skylights put in my place.
The people who live above me are furious!
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
Do they have reserved parking for non-handicapped people at the Special Olympics?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
The other day I went to a tourist information booth and said:
"Tell me about some of the tourists who were here last year?
GO BACK
