AICW Presents: SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST!!!! The Preview Show Part 1 (The scene opens to a live feed outside of the Metrodome in Minnapolis, Minnesota. The camera pans around the surrounding neighboorhood where we can hear the many cars driving in and the fans entering the arena. The camera then switches to a feed from the office of the AICW Commisioner Argie Otero as she sits at her desk. She is dressed in a sharp business suit.) Argie Otero: (clears throat) Ladies and Gentlemen, due to some technical difficulties, we apologize for the delay of the Pay Per View. Also, because of these "difficulities" I regret to inform you that I am "forced" to raise the price of this Pay Per View from $14.95 to $19.95. Some "unseen" production cost came up and we have to make up the difference. Again, we apologize for the delay and I hope you enjoy this program. Thank you. (The camera then switches from Argie Otero's desk back to the arena where we see that many of the fans are filing in. The ring technicians are shown putting the final touches on the wrestling ring and we then see the AICW's Andy Burton dressed in his usual black tux with a red bowtie.) Andy Burton: Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Dan "The Man" Chan and "The Mack" JAMES MACK! ("Return of The Mack" by Mark Morrison plays loudly throughout the arena as Dan "The Man" Chan and "The Mack" James Mack make their way down the aisle. Dan is wearing a black suit jacket and tie, while James is wearing a blue Tommy Hilfiger suit with white Nike sneakers. The camera closes in on the duo. James dances down the aisle quickly tagging the hands of some of the fans as they make their way down the aisle.) Dan "The Man" Chan: Good Evening everyone and welcome to the AICW's SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST!!!! I'm your host Dan Chan and joining me this evening is everybody's favorite "ebonics" commentator "The Mack" James Mack! "The Mack" James Mack: What's up yo? I'm just up here kicking it live with my main man Dan Chan, you know what I'm saying? Dan: Yeah, I know that stuff you be kicking! James: Yo don't try and talk ebonics Dan! You sound like a herb! Dan: Is that good or bad?? James: Shut up YO! Dan: Anyway, welcome one and all to our long awaited Pay Per View! Tonight, here on the preview show, we have some last minute comments from your favorite AICW Superstars, as well as the wedding of "The Convict" Oswald Bates and Cyn Garibaldi!!! James: Yo man, are they gonna get married in a jail yo? Dan: Actually, they are getting married at the new and improved Slim's Chance! James: That should be PHAT! Dan: Anyway, let's take a look at some comments made by the groom himself "The Convict" OSWALD BATES!!!!! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Oswald: Troy, Del Rio, Enterprise...it's only a couple of days away. The time is near, for me. It is my time. It is the FIRM's time. We are taking over the AICW, and your the last blockade in our path. Granted, you most likely will be tougher than the Town[beep] Rebellion, but needless to say, we will come out on top, ain't that right Vinny? Vincent: Hell ya Oz...the FIRM cannot be stopped! Oswald: Cyn...c'mere a sec. Cyn: What's up? Oswald: You ready for Sunday? Cyn: The wedding, or the match? Oswald The wedding of course...you won't be involved in the match... Cyn: Oh yes I will...after what that limp Del Rio said about me...I will definatly be there. Oswald: I want you to stay out of trouble. Okay? Cyn: You know me Oz....I can handle myself. All I want, is one shot at Del Rio. He talks a lot about me, when I'm not around, but if I'm there....he'll be beggin for mercy! Oswald: That's fine...and I know you can handle myself. But this is different. I just don't know about these guys. They always seem as though they have an alter motive. Cyn: Ozzy...you know I can take care of them. Ask Vinny! Oswald: Okay...it look's like we may have a new mystery parter? Cyn Garibaldi back in the ring? Hmmmmmmm.... Cyn: Not a bad idea at all...Del Rio. This weekend...you will pay. You talk about me and you? Well...last I remember, you couldn't get FIRM from what I heard, so I wouldn't be talking. My man Oz here outweighs you in more way than one, if you know what I mean! Cyn: Survival of the Fittest....the FIRM will stay alive. Oswald: AICW, you only wish you could get as FIRM as us! ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Dan: The AICW Television Champion sure looks ready!!! James: Oh snap!!! Yo man Cyn got a BIG OL BUTT!!!! I can get wit some of that! Dan: Are you kidding me? Ozzy would kill you! Anyway, coming up next, here is someone whom I'm sure you will like James, "Erotic" ERIN MCCOYS! --------------------------------------------------------------------------- [Scene: Cameras show Cesar Colon and a camera man standing outside La` Italian, a very expensive Beverly Hills resteranut. Cesar is seen checking his mic and his hair at the same time. He is wearing a blue suit with a red tie. Cesar smiles] Cesar Colon: How's my hair? OH! Good! Evening AICWites! Tis I, Cesar Colon on location and doing a little undercover work! That's right, thanks to my special sources, I've been told that Miss Erin McCoys is inside this very establishment. It's my job to try and get some words from her about her recent roles in the AICW and most of all, her relationship with the Stone! Come on! Not a moment to lose! [Cesar and the camera man quickly scamper into the building where they are greeted by a very tall male hostess. He has thick black hair and a small pencil think goatee. He's wearing a tuxedo. An angry looks appears on the man's face as he sees the camera] Hostess: Excuse me! Sir! You cannot bring that camera in here. Do you KNOW where your at? This is only the finest resteraunt in Beverly Hills! The rich and famous dine here and they do NOT want to be disturbed. Cesar Colon: But... But... Hmmm... What if I make it worth your while? Hostess: Pardon? Cesar Colon: You heard me. [Cesar lends over to the man and slips a large wad of money into his pocket] Cesar Colon: Now.. You wouldn't HAPPEN to know where Erin McCoys is dining do you? Hostess: [big smike] Right this way my fine man.. [He leads them to another room with only one small table, away from everyone else. Sitting at the table is done other then Erin McCoys.. and.. LEONARDO DICAPRIO. Erin is wearing a purple Jasmine style dress with white lace ribbon accenting the trim. Leonardo is wearing a very trendy black suit with a yellow colored blouse and a matching black tie. They are seen sitting next to each other. Leonardo is whispering something into Erin's ear as she giggles and she is playing with his tie. Cesar lets out a rather loud "AHEM" as Erin and Leo jump and then get annoyed look on their faces] Leonardo DiCaprio: I can't believe this... Erin McCoys: Cesar.. You better have a BRILLENT reason why you are here. Cesar Colon: WOW.. Leonardo DiCaprio! I LOVED you in Titanic! Wow.. You are SOO cool! Leonardo DiCaprio: Ummm.. Thanks but we were kinda in the middle of something. Erin McCoys: Yeah Cesar.. Get out of here before you get a breadstick up your nose. Cesar: Umm. I can't leave Miss! I've been put on strict assignment by the AICW Magazine to get some questions answered by you. It won't take long I promise! I can see you have.. better things to do. Erin McCoys: Very observant Cesar.. [looking over at Leo] Let's get started. Cesar: Okay.. Well first thing first, Johnny Smith's recent interview was VERY over the edge don't you think? What does that say about him in your mind? Erin McCoys: Only one word sums it up.. Desperate. Smith knows he's going to lose so he's trying DESPERATLY to still be the big tough macho man. As time goes on Johnny Smith gets more and more pathetic. It's almost getting painful to watch. A man who was once on top of the world but is now nothing more then a complete failure. How do you think people are going to remember your career Johnny? I'll give you a hint. It's being with an E and ends with an N. That's right. The only thing they will EVER remember about you is that you were once with me. Johnny, why do you even try anymore? Bringing in those rejects to stroke your ego.. Leonardo DiCaprio: Among other things... Erin McCoys: I swear this is the perfect guy but moving on.... Smith, it's time you reliazed the cold harsh truth. You were never good. You were never the man you proclaim yourself to be. The only reason anyone ever CONSIDERED you a threat was because of me. I was the threat, you were nothing but the big dumb guy who'd open his mouth once in a while, something stupid would come out and I would have to fix your mistakes. Well you know what? I'm not around anymore to pick up for you. Get your Mother to do that. You don't want to hear me speak the truth of our relationship? Do I sense guilt? Too bad Johnny.. You can't run away from your problems. You can't disappear and hope everything will be forgotten. I don't work that way. Cesar: So I take it during the match you will be cheering for The Stone, correct? Erin McCoys: Let's put it this way, if Johnny Smith was wrestling the Devil I'd be wearing a Devil tee shirt. Anyone who is going to humilate and destroy him, I"m all for. Smith needs a lesson taught to him and maybe I can't teach it to him all by myself but I sure as hell can help. When it comes to this sport, if I was a man, I'd be a world champion.. THAT's how good I am. On my absolute worst day, Johnny still couldn't out do me and he knows that. EQ and Thompson don't like me.. watch me cry a river boys. Your nothing but scrubs anyway. Two fools put in there to make Smith look better then he is. You put Sensuous Samantha next to two beasts and even she'd look good. Cesar: You do run away with a topic don't you! Erin McCoys: When I have things to say, I'm going to say them. [Leonardo suddenly reaches over and starts kissing Erin's neck. She blushes frantically and hides her face] Leonardo DiCaprio: I think it's time for you to leave.... Cesar: I think so do. Miss McCoys.. thank you for your time... Erin McCoys: [not even paying attention] Uh huh.. Sure.. whatever.. Leo! [blushes] Cesar: Back to you Dan! [fade to black] -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dan: Erotic Erin getting ready for the big Pay Per View like only she can! James: Yeah, me and Erin had a little "workout" before I rode over here, if you know what I mean! Dan: Coming up next, newcomer GEORGE MULDOON!!!