12/21/01
Hello everyone and welcome to the “I can’t stand the pressure of the holidays” edition of the Terry Taylor Perspective. Is it just me or does anyone else out there think this Christmas (or to be politically correct) this “holiday” season seems a little weird? Maybe it’s the 50-degree weather instead of 5 feet of snow, or the feeling following the September 11th attack, or the unemployment rate creeping up causing all of us to worry more and rejoice less. There is a lot of uncertainty in the world and uncertainty in our lives. Why do you think one in four Americans is on some type of antidepressant?
Did you know most suicides are committed during the holidays? I thought I was the only one with in-law problems! Sorry, I had to say that. Sorry. Getting back to that disturbing fact, why would someone pick the happiest time of the year to do harm to themselves? What is it about the holidays that make people feel such a way where they don’t want to continue? Are the holidays the happiest time of the year? We all know they’re supposed to be, but are they? If the holidays are a source of stress and anxiety, why are they?
The answer is one word: PRESSURE, pure and simple. We are told our whole lives the holidays are the best time of the year and we’re to reconnect with family and friends. We’re also told with the holidays comes the end of one year and with it – the beginning of a new, a fresh start. Almost every faith has a holiday near the end of the calendar year, so most believers are on the same time frame. What could be better than a clean slate, a brand new beginning?
Well, if all this wonderfulness were happening, why would we feel pressure? Why wouldn’t we get swept up in it with everyone else? Oh, you mean other people feel the pressure, too? Pressure to buy the right gifts. Pressure to measure up to the in laws. Pressure to pay for the gifts we feel obligated to buy, thanks to ingenious advertising campaigns? Pressure to look at the guy next to you and say, “Why aren’t I as happy or successful as him?”
Why can’t the holidays be like they used to be? I remember when all I could think about was Santa sliding down my chimney (even if we did live in Florida) and what great presents he would leave me. The holidays meant great food, lousy company, and lots of football! Man, that was living! What happened?
I grew up. I became the giver instead of the taker. I was the one up until 4:30 A.M. trying to put the train set together so Cody would think Santa had been there. I was the one looking out for my family’s needs and wants. Yes, at one time I did get miserable, but it was my own fault. Do you know why? It was because I forgot this simple rule –
THE MAIN THING IS TO KEEP THE MAIN THING, THE MAIN THING. Sounds simple doesn’t it? Most profound thought provoking phrases do. I forgot to strengthen my faith. I forgot to lead my family by example. I forgot to reinforce my friendships. I forgot to be satisfied with what I had. I forgot to be thankful
instead of prideful. I forgot I should never measure my success by using someone else’s as a yardstick. I forgot to be grateful for all the good in my life.
I forgot to keep the main thing the main thing. What is the “Main Thing?” If you saw “City Slickers” with Billy Crystal, Bruno Kirby, Daniel Stern, and Jack Palance, you’ll know where this is going. Billy had everything a man could want in life, but was unhappy. He went on a cattle drive to find his smile. Crystal and Palance had a rocky relationship because Jack knew Billy was blessed, but was too negative to see it. In a crucial scene in the movie, Jack confronts Billy about his misery. Billy asks, “What’s the secret to happiness?”
Jack said, “One thing.”
Billy asked, “What one thing?”
Jack says, “That’s up to you.”
No truer words were ever spoken. Jack Palance said it his way and I say it my way. No matter how one looks at it, it’s the same answer.
KEEP THE MAIN THING THE MAIN THING!
Happy Holidays!!!
The Taylor Family
Terry Taylor