What Matters
Volume 1, Issue 1
Death of the Hansons
Dateline Dickson City-Today, at sometime between 2:00 and 3:00 in the morning, the singing group known as Hanson met an untimely death. In their hotel room on Main Street, the Hansons were submitted, to a brutal, execution style killing. As a local plice officer, Chris Lobo puts it "When you have a group this annoying, alot of people want them dead." To date, there are no leads to who shot them, but the local paramilitary group called "The Alliance" is suspected. The police however, can not find the high-powered shot gun used in the killings, and local citizens are less then helpful. None of them claim to have heard the shotgun blasts.
The citizens of this town however, are not concerned about this issue. As put by one Steve Nenderson, "I didn't like them anyway. In fact, I think it is better , now that they are dead." The rest of the town seems to share this sentiment.
In the humble opinion of this reporter, this is possibly the best thing that could happen to the music world. Of course, they will not be missed.
The funeral will be held between 1:30 and 1:31 pm on Saturday at the Sequoia Funeral Home.
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