Dateline Cincinnati- A truly sad occasion in the history of this country, a large, five hundred foot cockroach ate the entire city of Cincinnati.
The roach was detected off the coast of New York City, however it completely ignored the Big Apple, and went straight for Cincinnati. This made several New Yorkers mad. As put by one of their cab drivers, "Onnga Natumby kayman si eht tseb topla gummy." the translation for this? How the Hell should I know?!
"For lunch he just chewed on a suburb or two, and for dinner he ate the whole town." was the way one of the survivors put it.
The President had nothing to say on this, because he was "Very busy."

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