Many times this year, I have mentioned things about my family ,in the ways that we as children, were raised by our parents, and how it affected our lives as grownups. One of my readers asked me about my inlaws, and how it was with them, and how my marriage to one of the greatest ladies around, affected my life now. I must say that the readers want to know something more about this old man, and so I will answer them through this column, on how my life as it is, was affected by another family. And so, you will know how I was accepted into my second family, and how my life with Ramona came about.

In 1956, I met ,through a good friend of mine, a thin pretty girl of seventeen, who sort of hit it off with me right away. Here was a girl that was trying to make some money by baby-sitting whenever she could, and she was very good at doing it. So, most of her time was taken up by that job she had, and it wasn't too often that we could get together for a date. And of course I was working at the Steel Mill. , sometimes sixteen hours a day, and I really did not have too much time to go out either. So, many times our time together, was in the form of a hour or two after both of us were through with our jobs.  This was after eleven o'clock in the evening, and most people were already turned in for the night. This sort of made life a little hectic for both of our parents, because coming from large families and living under a set of rules set down by them, we were not supposed to be out too late, and our parents would wait up for us to let us in the door of our homes. Back in those days, as long as you lived in your parents house, you went by thier rules. It's true. It didn't matter how old you were, if you were living at home, they had the last say. Most people these days would not like that, because they want to be able to boss the older folks around.

Well, I remember one night that I pulled up in front of my girlfriend's home, and we stood by the house talking, and all the time the motor of my "46" Dodge was running, with it's mello pipes sounding off. It wasn't very long before her dad hollered out the window, to turn that noisy car off, and I did, even though I was getting ready to leave in a few minutes. Well, when I got ready to leave after a few kisses and several hugs, the car would not start, and so she had to ask her dad to take me home. I didn't have the nerve to ask him.  Boy, that was very hard to do because I really had not spent any time with him, and I sort of was a little scared. And my home with my parents was in New London about twelve miles away. But this fine gentleman told me that it was ok, and that he would take me home. That really was the first real contact with my girlfriend's family, and it turned out very good. I eventually met her mother, and her brothers and sister ,and it looked like they were going to accept me into thier lives, and that was ok with me. As a matter of fact, the kids sort of liked to see me come for a meal, because Mom Sarah would really fix a great meal for me and the rest of the family.  This great lady by the name of Sarah was a great cook just like my mother was. Bless that great lady's heart.

And so, as you start meeting your girlfriend's family , you start visiting her grandparents and uncles and aunts, as well as all thier children. I must say here, that this young man was treated like one of the family from day one, as I met each member of them, and ever since then, I have been treated great, and I have felt as ease with my second family. The Mckee Family and The Budd Family took me under thier wings and I have never regreted the day that I met Ramona and became one of her family. Back in those days when family was very important, it was the thing to spend a lot of time with your girlfriends family, because it was like being home with your own family.

You hear a lot about men and women, who have problems with thier inlaws, because they meddle in thier life. But I have to say here that my inlaws always accepted me for what I am and at no time did they ever tried to meddle into our lives. If anything, they have always been there for me, when I needed help and will always be part of my family. That was the way it was in the old days. Families were more close. The families that you married into, were ready to accept you into thier lives. You didn't see too much of children born to single parents. You had reunions each week ,because all the cousins were always around to see and visit with. And you called your uncles and aunts by that name. You were taught from early childhood ,that grandparents, parents, uncle and aunts were special and they were to be respected as such.

I remember one time when at the age of seventeen, I addressed my aunt by her first name instead of aunt, and my mother let me know real quick that you respect your aunt by calling her by Aunt Liz. It didn't take long in those days to get a point across about respect. So, when I entered into my wife's family , I knew better than to call them by only thier first name. But to this day, even though Mom Sarah and Pop Harold have been called home by the Great Father, the memories of them still exist in my heart. Here were two people who came from great families themselves, who were ready to offer this young man a membership into thier lives. Here were aunts and uncles who did the same, giving this young man a chance to enlarge his family. To say that I felt special would be wrong to say, but to know that I was accepted was a feeling of being special.

What a wonderful thing it would be if we could of been able to be together as a family, without some members of that family passing away. Think about all the things that we could sit around the table and be able to compare with what we have today. What those who lived before us made possible for our young folk to have today, will live on in all our lives, and will be a memory set to music someday. Someone will one day want to travel back into time in the thirties, forties,  and fifties, and put together those memories into a story of love and sacrafice by those great people that we all called Mom & Dad

As we grow older and we see our loved ones leave to be with the Great Father, we only have those who are left and with the memories that still lie inside my heart, we wait for that time when the Great Father decides to call us home to once again be with our loved ones. What more can we ask of our life than to be a part of several families who want to share thier love with you. To be able to say that my life here on the earth has been worthwhile, and to know that I was loved not only by my parents , but also by my wife's parents, and all the families connected , I can only say thanks for the memories. And if anyone out there who is a part of those families want to know that they are loved, then here it is. "I LOVE YOU." As always visit my web site and continue to send me e-mails at either one of my addresses. They are [email protected] and [email protected]  Until we visit together next time, I ask for your prayers and  I ask GOD to bless each and every one of you. Until then this is Uncle Ray signing off.