Things You Would Never Know Without The Movies

· During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

· All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

· Most dogs are immortal.

· If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.

· All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French Bread.

· It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

· Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.

· The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No-one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

· You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

· Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.

· If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor's first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.

· The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

· A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

· If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.

· The Chief of Police is always black.

· When paying for a taxi, don't look at your wallet as you take out a bill, just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

· Interbreeding is genetically possible with any creature from elsewhere in the universe.

· Kitchens don't have light switches. When entering a kitchen at night, you should open the fridge door and use that light instead.

· Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.

· Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning even though their husband and children never have time to eat it.

· Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

· The Chief of Police will always suspend his star detective - or give him 48 hours to finish the job.

· A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of RFK Stadium.

· Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

· Although in the 20th century it is possible to fire weapons at an object out of our visual range, people of the 23rd century will have lost this technology.

· Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

· It is not necessary to say hello or good-bye when beginning or ending phone conversations.

· Even when driving down a perfectly straight road it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.

· All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.

· It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

· A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

· If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

· Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

· It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.