Fire fighting jokes
Volunteer Fire Department
A fire started on some grassland near a farm in Indiana.  The fire department from a nearby town was called to put out the fire.  The fire proved to be more than the small town fire department could handle, so someone suggested that a rural volunteer fire department be called.  Though there was doubt that they would be of any assistance, the call was made.  Five minutes later, the volunteer fire department arrived in a dilapidated old fire truck.  They drove straight towards the fire and stopped right in the middle of the flames.  The volunteer firemen jumped off the truck and franttically started spraying water in all directions.  Soon, they had snuffedout the center of the fire, breaking the blaze into two easily controllable parts.  The farmer was impressd with the volunteer fire department's work and so grateful thathis farm had been spared.  The next day he presented a check for $!000 to the volunteer fire department.  A local news reporter asked the volunteer fire captain what the department planned to do with the funds.  "That should be obvious," replied the captain.  "The first thing we're gonna do is get them damn brakes fixed on that there fire truck."
Nursery School Discussion
A nursery school teacher was delivering a station wagon full of kids home one day when a fire truck zoomed past.  Sitting in the fromt seat of the fire truck was a Dalmation.  The children started discussing the dog's duties.  One youngster said "They use him to keep crowds back." "No," said another, "He's just for good luck."
A third child brought the arguement to a close.  "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrant."
You might be on a Redneck Volunteer department if...
your department has ever had two emergency vehicles pulled over for drag racing on the way to the scene.
you have naked lady mud flaps on your pumper.
your firehouse has wheels.
you've ever gotten back and found out you locked yourselves out of the firehouse.
fire training consists of everyone standing around a fire gettin' drunk.
you've ever been toned out on an outhouse fire.
that outhouse fire was with entrapment.
you've ever let a person's house burn down because they wouldn't let you hunt on their ground.
your personnel vehicle has more lights on it than your house has lights in it.
you've ever walked through a christmas display and came up with more than 3 new ideas for a light scheme for your truck.
your rescue truck ca smoke the tires.
your department's name is misspelled on the equipment.
dispatch can't mention your name without laughing.
the local news crew won't put your department on TV because you embarassed them last time.
you've ever referred to a light bar as sexy.
your defib consists of a pair of jumper cables, a marine battery, and a fish finder.
you've ever taken a girl on a date in a pumper.
your pumper hasbeen on fire more times than it has been to a fire.
your pumper smokes more than the house fire.
you've ever been arrested for indecent exposure at a house fire.
More to come....
I want more funny!!
Too much humor for me...
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