Anyone find this freaky? I like how they use Netscape 3.
This is freaky too. I bet the pentagon logs my keystrokes. They must be entertained with my conversations with my mom about how I'm getting home for Christmas and what I'm going to do in January.
In other news, After almost 2 months, I finally received the Garden Botanika citrus cleansing face wash in the mail. To top off the entire Garden Botanika story, the tube was cracked and it was everywhere in the box :/....sigh. So, instead of getting a $17 bottle of face, I got a $17 UPS package with frozen facewash and styrofoam peanuts in it.
Oh, I haven't written about my phone book issue. Well, when you get a phoneline here in Salem, Questdex sends you a phone book, except I never got one. So two weeks after getting the phoneline, I called and ordered one...never got it. Two weeks later, I called and ordered one to be delivered today...didn't get it. I'm not sure what's so illusive about where I live. It's not hidden and it's well labeled. People here smoke crack - not that there's anything wrong with that.
This is what happens when you don't have copy editors with dirty minds. Or perhaps they do, but they were asleep at the keyboard...
In other news, I'm tired.
In other news, well, I can't think of any ...
For a while, I wrote about crime for The Albuquerque Tribune. One time,
I wrote a brief story about a young guy who was charged with killing
another young guy. . . . The day the story appeared, I got a call from his
mother. "Is this Doug Brown?" she asked.
"Yes."
"You wrote that story about my son?"
"Which story?"
"It was in today's paper, about my son who killed that guy."
"Yes," I said. "Yes, I wrote that story."
"Where's the picture?" she shouted. "I want his picture on the front
page! Can you do that?"
"No, I can't. I'm sorry," I said, startled. "And pardon my asking, but
why do you want his picture in the paper, given what police say he did?"
"Are you kidding? I just want to see my boy's face on the front page of
The Albuquerque Tribune! I'll buy lots of papers for my family and friends!
Nobody in my family has ever been in the paper before!"
I told her it was unlikely his picture would get into paper, and she was
very disappointed. She asked, angrily: "What the hell does somebody have to
do to get their picture in the paper?"
Now wasn't that wholesome?
In other news, I made tempura today. Isn't that nice? And fattening!!!
So what did we learn today? A $14.99 keyboard from Office Depot is just as good as the $69.99 keyboard I bought 2 years ago.
In other news, Let's give it up for those tough journalists! Thatta girl! I think if I were here and I had a large, black lesion on my middle finger, I'd do a little more than put neosporin and a bandaid on it. I'd probably pick at it for awhile and fling scabs everywhere...who wouldn't do that?
There must be some very unhappy Americans/foreigners that really don't like the freedoms Americans have. Whatever happened to, "If you don't like it, leave!"? If you don't like America and what it stands for, get the heck out and go find yourself in Madagascar or something.
Of course, the same should apply to America - if we don't like how people live their lives in their countries, then we should just leave 'em be. I think that's pretty much how we got ourselves into the situation we're in now. We've but our heads into other people's businesses, trying to solve everyone's problems and cure everyone's diseases. Well, as Celine Dion has sang, "It's all coming back to me now..."
In other news, Click here to order some rodents!!! yayayay!
So let's teach our children that we won't tolerate other people and their ways, let's teach them to make angry fists and punch out the bad people with our crosses.
Hmmm...maybe that's not what it means.
Let's not tolerate the snotty teen-agers in our public schools! They don't tell the truth. How do we know that? Because they are snotty!
Hmmm...maybe that's not it either.
Anyhow, the bumper sticker is scary. If everyone didn't tolerate people who were different, people who chose a different religion than Christianity, people who smell different (if they smell like pooopooo, you dont have to tolerate them...just tell them to shower or wipe their butts), but you get the picture. If we didn't tolerate the people we call our neighbors, America wouldn't be "united" let alone a happy place to live. OK, so I've always wanted to move to Canada, but I think you get it...right?
See, I'm so out of touch with my little rants that I'm not sure if this even counts. I will try again later.
Work still kinda sucks.
Robert, I will write you back! Boy that was a hefty email you sent me.
Everyone should visit Venice and send me long emails. So when I go to Venice, I know what to see and do (only because y'all wrote about that stuff).
The cable guy is here hooking up my cable. I am excited. Can you feel my excitement?
But I still have to go to work. Poo.
Oh. I went to Portland this weekend and on my way back, a rock about the size of my big toe fell out of this gravel truck in front of me and cracked my windshield. But because I am kind of smart, they are going to fix it (I wrote down the license/trailer number and stuff). I am happy about that.
I'm in Salem now, working at the Salem Statesman Journal. It's ok. Everyone is older, which is different 'cause everyone in La Crosse is hip and young and if they're not young, they're way cool. I can't say that about Salem yet. Anyways, It's OK here. I'd rather be in La Crosse though...
I got out of going to Arlington, Va., though. So instead I stayed home and went hiking and bought an umbrella.
Did y'all notice that Joel Stein is getting married? Click here to weep with Laney, Katye and I.
I'll write more later now that I've figured out how to dial the freakin number to log onto the Internet.
