CONGRATULATIONS! You have made the fine choice to enter this most wonderful and fabulous page! Good for you!
You have chosen wisely and I value your discerning taste in deciding to travel those few extra kilometers for a product of real quality. Everything on this site has been designed to meet the exacting standards that you have naturally come to expect from me. You may relax and enjoy this quality product secure in the knowledge that it has been specially created for the lover of fine things and of good taste.
Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire Public-relations writers.
Always remember ..you're unique, just like everyone else.
A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.
Hi! My name is Francesca. I am happy you showed up! It's lonely here all by myself. Ok, now I know that at this very moment you are thoroughly enjoying my hugely spectacular and wondrous page and it would almost break your heart to stop and proceed in another direction or bother with anything as frivolous as something other than enjoying my page, but sit and read this part very carefully. It's important. If you enjoy this superb page (as, of course, you DO), then I implore you to e-mail me. Tell me how much you love my prime and creative homepage and give me your credit card number. Now, hang on! I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, "Why should I give Franni my credit card number? As wonderous and spectacular as her page is and oh-so deserving of any and all financial contributions I could possibly give - and more -, the page was free to create!" And to this I say yes, true, but, one must remember how us struggeling artists selflessly devote all our time and considerable abilities to the creation of the divine (such as this page) purely for the enrichment and unsurpassed joy it brings to others and thusly we cannot go out and get real jobs and become productive members of society or sustain ourselves. We expect others to do that for us. Therefore, I urge you to think not of yourself for once but to help out a young entrepreneur with her efforts to make the World Wide Web a less stressful place. Do it because it is the right thing to do. Do it for your country. Do it for yourself. But most of all, do it for me. I'm broke. Thank you.
I accept Visa, Mastercard, and American Express. NEW! I now also accept personal checks.
If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms.
Bacteria: the only culture some people have.
Franni's Pets
Temporarily Discontinued...check back occassionally for further developments......
People who live in glass houses don't have much of a sex life.
Those who cannot remember the past will spend a lot of time looking for their cars in mall parking lots.
Franni's Tips on How To Be Sure To Lose All Your Friends
t r e a ding wa t e r (VERY cool)
I am expecting more to follow. You should too.
Why isn't "palindrome" spelled the same way backwards?
Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
Construction is running a tad slow...
A soft answer turneth away wrath -- but not telephone salespeople.
Drink wet cement and get really stoned.
Q:Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men?
A:When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.
These are my philosophies on any and all political, social and economical issues.
AND
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy more tunnel.
Everybody has a photographic memory. . . . Some don't have film.
How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
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This ULEX Ring
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It was like that time I hid behind the bush and your dog mistook me for a tree...
He who dies with the most toys, is, nonetheless, still dead.
Fat people are harder to kidnap.
And here are some of my favorite pics.*
*These will be changed periodically for your viewing pleasure.
Handy Guide to Modern Science:
1. If it's green or it wiggles, it's biology.
2. If it stinks, it's chemistry.
3. If it doesn't work, it's physics.
I don't want the world. I just want your half.
Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
If you're here, you were probably just at the Chathouse, so do go back
and continue to speak with me as soon as you finish up here. I like you. No, really!
I always try to go the extra mile at work, but my boss always finds me and brings me back
How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're at.
Also, this is my very FIRST page, so I will be adding and making it better. But if I don't feel like it, I won't, and it
might just stay this bad forever. Even so, don't come and tell me it sucks. Because then you suck. Yes, really!
Have a nice day.
I'd love to make up my mind, but I can't remember where I left it.
Be good or I'll pee behind your sofa.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Send email to [email protected] if you like.
Do it because it's the right thing to do.
Awwwwww, come on!
Please?
E-mail me here!
Thanks for visiting..
I've no doubt it was worth it.
Who woulda thunk?
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That's all there is and there ain't no mo'!
FANKS!
Um, as of 1:28am MST May 3rd 1997 there have been
Be proud you were one of them.