Men?! *ROFLMAO*



What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.

What's the difference between government bonds and men?
Bonds Mature.

What is the difference between a man and a catfish?
One is a bottom-feeding scum-sucker and the other is a fish.

What did God say after creating man?
I can do better.

Husband: Want a quickie?
Wife: As opposed to what?

What are two reasons why men don't mind their own business?
1. No mind.
2. No business.

What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist.

Why do jocks play on artificial turf?
To keep them from grazing.

If men got pregnant....
abortion would be available in convienience stores and drive through windows.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because they already have boyfriends.

Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it?
Wife: You wear briefs, don't you?

What's the difference between a porcupine and a Corvette?
The porcupine has pricks on the outside.

How many men does it take to pop popcorn?
Three. One to hold the pan and two others to show off and shake the stove.

How do men sort their laundry?
"Fifthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".

Only a man would buy a $500 car and put a $4000 stereo in it.

Two guys were strolling down the street when one guy exclaimed, "How sad - a dead bird." The other man looked up and said, "Where?"

Note: It is rumored that this list was originally circulated around female members of congress.




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