A journey of one thousand miles begins with a step, so is the Christian journey to heaven. Every Christian must have to start the planning of his trip to heaven from the home just like when you prepare for the office in the mornings or when you prepare to travel abroad. The proverb that says charity begins at home stand true for every Christian. A good home groomed child will always be a treasure to the society. The growing moral decadence today is the offspring of broken marriages, bickering and quarrelsome parents, and crowned with sin and ungodliness in homes.
Now lets look at God's plan for a happy and harmonious home.
In the Garden of Eden, God gave the woman to the man as a help meet Gen 2:20-25. The very first man Adam, acknowledged that the woman was his own flesh and bone and no mater how terrible the punishment meted on him for the miscalculation of the woman's revelation (knowledge of evil) he will not cut his own flesh away from himself. Little do we Christians today know why we are so far away from the same God that walked in the cool of the evenings with Adam, walked in the fiery furnace with the three Hebrew children, spoke with both Abraham and Moses as close friends and honour the words of Elijah and Elisha. Man has change from the very loving and caring Adam in Eden.
Apostle Paul in his writing to the Colossians said (Col 3:19) "Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them". A Christian husband must love his wife at all times and should not let his love for the wife to diminish for what ever reason. There should not be bitterness in your home, even when your wife erred. Rather you should admonish her and consider her as a weaker vessel and physically frail. 1 Pet 3:7 Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered. As a Christian you should love, honour and cherish your wife as a precious Jewel.
The wife is to the husband what the church is to Christ. (Eph 5:25) "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it". The church (the body of Christ) depends solemnly on Christ and do nothing without Christ (John 15:5 "I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing"). The man must be ready to sacrifice his life for his wife's if need be. The wife should be regarded as the apple of the man' eye, (Zec 2:8 "For thus saith the LORD of hosts; After the glory hath he sent me unto the nations which spoiled you: for he that toucheth you toucheth the apple of his eye")
Finally, a Christian husband must nourish and cherish his wife at what ever situation. Children or any form of relative should not in any way be allowed to interfere your marriage. The wife is your flesh and bone so any misunderstanding should be settled between you ( i.e. without a third party) prayerfully in meekness, humility and love, knowing that which ever of you that take the blame does not matter because you are one flesh. Matt. 19:4-6. She MUST never be used as a slave, door mat, punching bag, or made to suffer in any form. She must be provided with the maximum comfort you can offer. No woman in the whole world should be made better than her or even equated to her. She is the only personalised possession you have in this world. If you can not obey this simple life style of God, then do not expect your prayers to get near the throne of God 1Pet. 37c. And that will mean that no matter how much religious you feel, dance and sing in the spirit and speak in an unknown tongues, you are just a noise maker. Read 1 Cor 13:1.
The Christian wife is commanded to be in total subjection unto the husband. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul said (Eph 5:22) Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. By submitting yourself to your husband, you are invariably submitting yourself to God. You cannot in any way claim that you are submitting yourself to God when you nag and disdain your husband. As the church is under the rulership of Jesus Christ so are the Christian wives to their husbands. Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. There is nothing like 50 - 50 in Christian marriage. The headship of the home belongs to the man and must never be contested or threatened in any form by the wife. The Church cannot and will never be equal in place of headship with Christ so is the wife in respect to her husband.
Note that the church that contested headship with the Lord was refereed to as the whore and her daughters as harlots in Rev. 17. (Watch out for my message on Rev 17 coming out soon.)
You may ask me, what if you have an unbelieving husband? Unbelieving husband is not and should not be use as an excuse to usurp authority over the husband. Peter in his own epistle wrote in this words 1 Pet 3:1 Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives; 1 Pet 3:2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. 1 Pet 3:3 Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 1 Pet 3:4 But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. 1 Pet 3:5 For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: 1 Pet 3:6 Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
Ask yourself these questions if you have an unsaved husband. Does he see in you true Christian living? Are you obedient to him? Are you loyal, cheerful, and loving? If your answer is no or not sure to any of the them, then you are not there yet. You need to repent yourself and be save from your self-imposition. You cannot expect your unsafe husband to be won to the lord when you do not respect him. A nagging wife drives away her unsafe husband from God and or a thorn in the flesh of her saved husband. In which ever situation you are, nagging is not of God, it's of the devil and tears away the happiness in homes.
The Bible said in Proverbs 21:9 the "It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
A Christian wife is to be keeper at home. You are reminded that the home is your sphere. Any work or activity that will make your home secondary should be highly discouraged.
Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, Titus 2:5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.
Do not allow working away from home to hinder your responsibilities at home. Your husband and your children (if any) should always be your highest priority in contrast to any thing in this world. Sisters, you should not call yourselves children of God or Christians if you do not submit yourselves to your husbands. Your pastors and preachers should not take the position of your husband. Do not deceive yourselves by being reverential to the pastors and other brothers just because you think they are better than your husband. Your husband should always be the highest man in your life, no matter how small, big, poor, rich, ugly, handsome, learned, unlearned, saved or unsaved he is. You are married to him for what he is. Stay with him. Do not put him away because he is unsaved except if he wants to go, then you let him go and you'll then be free. Read 1 cor 7:12-16. If on the other hand, your unsaved husband wants you to comit sin, or goes against your worshiping God, then you have no options but to tell him that you have chosen the way of the Lord and that he should consider accepting you as you are, or come to the Lord himself or reconsider your relationship. Do not however suggest divorce to him.
As I mentioned earlier, the two of you are now one flesh. God sees you and recognise you as one. Do not hurt one another, do not be bitter with one another, do not hide any thing from one another. In as much as the man is the head of the woman, so is the woman the body of the man. As the husband owns the body of the wife, so also the wife owns the body of the husband. As the hand, leg, mouth, eye etc. harmoniously joint to keep the body, so should a man and his wife. Do not defraud yourselves without the concept of the other, and of course only for the period of fasting and praying. Read 1Cor 7:1-11.
The Lord commands the husbands to love their wives, and if the husband loves his wife as Christ love the church, the wife will have no difficulty in being subject to him. Though the head of the home and capable of taking decision binding the home, the husband should always seek the concept of the wife and put her comfort a higher priority to his own in making any decision. Matters affecting the home should always be discussed and jointly decided upon with the husband having the final say. The love for the wife should be as fervent as it was when you first started. Keep buying those presents you use to buy for her when you first started and even more.
The wife should desire him at all the time and cook for him that which he likes most. She should reverence him as her lord and call him sweet names.
Children are commanded to honour their father and mother. In the letter to the Ephesians Paul wrote in this word:- Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Eph 6:2 Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; Eph 6:3 That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth.
The Christian children should respect, honour, and obey their parent. Should not allow other children to influence them and or make them to do things that are bad. You should always listen to your parent and keep their instructions. Respect them and do not be ashamed of them for what ever reason. By honouring your parents, you'll be bless by God and you'll live longer on the earth. You'll please God, by obeying your parent. Col 3:20 Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord.
When Jesus was a child, the bible said he was subject to His parent. Luke 2:51a And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them. If Jesus who is God made flesh could be subject unto His parent, then we also have to subject to our parent.
Children should always accept instructions from their parent. Prov 1:8 My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother. Seek their view before you do any thing, and always take their advice. I am sure that every Christian parent will always give advises that are meant for the welfare of their children.
The parents owe the duty to bring up their children in a well mannered, disciplined and thoroughly nurtured in the Lord. The parent should inculcate home discipline in their and let them know why they have to remain like that for their lives in future.
The Christian parents are to teach their children the word of God from age one and or as soon as they start to talk and understand. Deu 6:6 And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: Deu 6:7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sitteth in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. Tell them about the inherited sin and the remedy, tell them about the God you serve and His grace for mankind, tell them that there is no salvation in any other name than the name of Jesus, let their bed time stories be curled from the old and new testaments. Read the bible to them very often and prove to them that they are real. Show them good examples and live a godly life for them to see. Do not let the word of God depart from your mouth and your hearth at all the time. Prov 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. Children are good imitators, so the best way to teach them is to live the life you want them to live.
You who tell your children not to steal; do you steal? you who tell your children not to tell lie do you tell lies yourself? They can only do what you do and unless God has a special call for them, do not expect them to leave a life that you have not shown them.
The Christian parent must readily correct their children when they do something that is wrong. While I do not support the beating, kicking, smacking and undue punishment of the children, I however encourage the occasionally use of the punishment the child fears most to correct his or her wrong doing. Do not use this punishment to maltreat your child, and do not sit there and allow them to have their way for what is wrong on the excuse that they have the right to live the way they want while they are still your responsibilities.
The bible encourages parent to correct their children even if it means using a certain amount of force. You'll certainly be doing your child a dis-service if you ignore his or her mistakes without corrections. Now study these scriptures carefully.
Prov 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
t Prov 23:13 Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Prov 23:14 Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.
Prov 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
God will judge your house if you do not correct your children but let them to do that which do not glorify God. 1 Sam 3:13 For I have told him that I will judge his house for ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained them not.
The Christian parents should not provoke their children to anger, but to love them and teach them the way of the Lord. Eph 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Do not discourage them with unnecessary rules and regulations, and endless pert corrections.
The man should always be respected by both the wife and the children in the home. His headship should be well accorded to him. He in response must strife to keep the family together. Should be the bread winner of the family. He should make sure God reign supreme in his house. The woman should be honoured and loved by the husband. All her needs and comfort should be attended to by her husband. The children should respect and obey her. The children should not be provoked or discourage, but rather loved by their parents and nurtured in the way of the Lord.
May the Lord help you to understand this message and to live a happy, sweet and loving home. Amen and amen.
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