W
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WAR
---
1) A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles...takes your
   mind off the price of living.
     - Brendan Behan

2) A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, then asks you
   not to kill him.
     - Winston Churchill

3) Nothing in life is so exhilarating as to be shot at without result.
     - Winston Churchill

4) Men love war because it allows them to look serious. Because it is the one
   thing that stops women from laughing at them.
     - John Fowles

5) The quickest way to end a war is to lose it.
     - George Orwell

6) History is littered with wars which everybody knew would never happen.
     - Enoch Powell

7) No battle is worth fighting except the last one.
     - Enoch Powell



WATERGATE
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1) Dick Nixon before he dicks you.
     - Car sticker

2) RICHARD NIXON: I admit my men made a sad mistake - they got caught.
     - Anon



WEATHER
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-  And here is the McRae weather forecast for tomorrow: Morning will bring
   bright daylight, while the advance of night will bring increasing darkness.
     - Richard McRae

1) And here is the forecast. Tomorrow will be muggy. Followed by Toogy, Weggy,
   Thurggy, and Friggy.
     - Anon

2) A: It's raining cats and dogs!
   B: I know, I've just stepped in a poodle.
     - Anon




WOMEN - THE MALE VIEW
---------------------
1) A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
     - Graffito

2) ...why haven't women got labels on their foreheads saying, 'Danger:
   Government Health Warning: women can seriously damage your brains, genitals,
   current accouts, confidence, razor blades, and good standing among your
   friends.'
     - Jeffrey Bernard

3) Certain women should be stuck regularly, like gongs.
     - Noel Coward

4) Women are like elephants to me; they're nice to look at, but I wouldn't
   want to own one.
     - W.C. Fields

5) In point of morals, the average woman is, even for business, too crooked.
     - Stephen Leacock

6) When a man takes an interest in a woman's body she accuses him of only
   taking an interest in her body, but when he doesn't take an interest in
   her body she accuses him of taking an interest in someone else's body.
     - P.J.O'Rourke



WRITING
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1) I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork.
     - Peter De Vries

2) I write when I'm inspired, and I see to it that I'm inspired at nine
   o'clock every morning.
     - Peter De Vries

3) Writing is easy; all you do is sit staring at a blank sheet of paper until
   drops of blood form on your head.
     - Gene Fowler

4) What no wife of a writer can understand is that a writer is working when he
   is staring out the window.
     - Burton Rascoe

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Y
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YOUTH
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1) Youth would be an ideal state if it came a little later in life.
     - Lord Asquith

2) The youth of the present day are quite monstrous. They have absolutely no
   respect for dyed hair.
     - Oscar Wilde

3) To win back my youth...there is nothing I wouldn't do - except take up
   exercise, get up early, or be a useful member of the community.
     - Oscar Wilde