Angela sat in the straight-backed wooden chair, absently staring out the window. It was near dawn and there was a gray haze blanketing all of New York. The air felt cool and moist and water was beginning to bead on the window pane. Angela sighed and watched as a light rain began to fall over the city.

I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I really don't. I'm a lone soldier fighting a battle that can't be won. What's the point anymore? This entire thing is tearing apart every relationship I have forged. I'm not on speaking terms with my father. I blamed him for this, although deep down I really know that it isn't anyone's fault. I don't know what I've done to Johnny. But I'm ashamed of it. Maybe I didn't do anything to him directly but maybe, maybe by doing nothing I did more damage than I could have ever imagined. I really don't know Johnny that well. He's my own brother but I still don't really feel like I know him. Maybe if I had talked to him, just taken a few minutes to talk...maybe I would have known how he felt.

I turn my head and my eyes fall upon Jack's sleeping figure. Jack. I feel so horrible. Why did I even get close to him? Why? I never stay for long. Never. So why bother? It causes more pain good; I leave a trail of broken relationships wherever I go. Oh, I feel so stupid. I need to get out of here. Leave the guilt behind. I don't want to think about it. But I can't keep running forever...... Finally I stand up and push open the window, carefully climbing onto the fire escape.

I roll over and squint in the gray light. It's gotta be nearly 4 am. And yet Angela is sitting there staring out the window. She looks exhausted, like she hasn't slept all night. I doubt that she has. Lord knows how long she's been listlessly gazing out that window. She looks so lost and alone. Suddenly she stands up and opens the window. I watch her climb out onto the fire escape in the early morning drizzle.

I've gotta talk to her. She's always said that she could talk to me about anything but she hasn't spoken to me in days. I can see it in her eyes. It's like she's defeated. But Angela doesn't get defeated. I don't know what's been going on with her. I've got to tell her..let her know... I can't let her go like this. I don't want to let her go. Ever. But I don't really have a choice. I need to tell her, before it's too late... How could she leave? How? Part of me is going to be leaving with her on that train to Boston.

Jack pushed open the window and stuck his head outside. "Hey, can I join ya?" he smiled at Angela. Angela looked at his tousled hair and silly grin and her face softened. "Sure." she said.

Jack climbed onto the fire escape and joined Angela in leaning over the railing. "Couldn't sleep?" he ventured. She shook her head. Jack straightened and looked Angela square in the face. She slowly turned to face him. She gazed at him briefly and shut her eyes in pain. All the emotions from the past few days came flooding back to her.

"Oh God, Jack, I am so sorry!" she cried as tears began to well in her eyes. Angela reached out and put her arms around Jack. Jack stood there, stunned for a moment, then wrapped his arms around her tightly. "For what?" he breathed. "For-for everything!" she exclaimed, pulling away. Jack loosened his grip but continued to hold onto her. "I'm sorry for blaming my father, I'm sorry for hitting Johnny, I'm sorry-" she stopped and stared at Jack for a moment. "I'm sorry for never being a real friend to Johnny," she whispered, "He's my own brother and I hardly know him." She looked down, ashamed. "And," she sighed, "I'm sorry for ever getting involved with you. I'm sorry for getting close to you. I'm sorry for telling you all my feelings and then just leaving. I'm sorry." She looked at him apprehensively.