The Ritter Files by Mulderslady File Three: Pain, Safety, and Love DISCLAIMER: They don't belong to me, wish they did. Only Nick, Skyler, Kevin, Van and Colton James Ritter a.k.a. CJ do. RATING: Pg-13 to R CLASSIFICATION: S, A, M/O, MOR, POV KEYWORDS: Mulder and CJ angst, M/O, MOR, POV SPOILERS: None URL: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Capsule/5160/ritterfiles.html FEEDBACK: Please!!! at damacia@home.com ARCHIVE: Oh yeah, anywhere!! SUMMARY: CJ Ritter meets her match in the person she least expects it. What happens when a part of your past resurfaces in a new form? Where will you find safety? Part of The Ritter Files series ***********************%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% But can you save me, Come on and save me If you could save me from the ranks Of the freaks who suspect they could never love anyone Cause I can tell you know what it's like Save me by Aimee Mann ***********************%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% 10 weeks later "Oh Kevin NO." "CJ it's going to be fun." Kevin said smiling at her sweetly. I've dated Kevin for 6 weeks now. He's wonderful, just like Mulder only he's black, which makes him family acceptable. I could fall in love with him easily, but I'm still in love with Mulder. I think about him constantly, it doesn't help that he's constantly calling, dropping by, begging for another chance. He sounds so lost, so helpless, but I can't . .. I can't go back no matter how much I want to. When I told my dad I was dating Kevin he said I made the right decision, rectifying my mistake. We're close again and I like that, but I yearn for Mulder. His laugh, his smile, the way his hands and lips feel on me, his comforting, intoxicating smell, his gravely voice whispering in my ear. "Earth to CJ, what were you thinking about?" Kevin said with an amused smile as he tried to get her attention. CJ snapped back to reality and responded "Nothing." "You were thinking about HIM weren't you?" "Yeah." "Well stop, this is my time." He said sharply, shocking her a second only to dispel her shock with a smile. 4 weeks later "CJ" Mulder whispered to himself as he watched her in Kevin's arms at the Teachers Awards ball. That should be me, I bought the perfect tux and everything. I feel lost with out her, he thought as he continued watching them dance. I just sat and cried all night when I got back, Skyler says I should give her space keep an eye on her. It's so hard, I just want to walk in there and snatch her from his arms, feel her smooth skin under my fingers, look into those beautiful green eyes. God I hope Kevin realizes how lucky he is. 3 months later Six months and Kevin is growing on me. He wants me to move in with him, and I'm considering it seriously. Our connection is so weird. Nick says its cause he's playing the same mind games as Stephen, closing me off till there is no one but him, but I don't see it. Kevin is always charming and nice, he loses his temper sure, but he always apologizes if he's forceful with me. "Hey, what are you writing honey?" Kevin said, coming into CJ's bedroom with a smile. CJ closed the notebook and flashed him the cover. "The Ritter Files: Private. Not anymore give it to me." "No, you can't read my journal Kevin, it's private, you do know what that means don't you?" CJ teased "Am I in there?" Kevin said his voice getting low and dangerous. "Yes." "Is HE in there?" "Yes, everyone's in it. Kevin, Nick, my mom, . . ." "Give it to me Now!" "No Kevin." CJ said giving him THE LOOK and returning to writing. He walked up to her and snatched it from her. "I think you heard what I said." "Kevin give that back." CJ said reaching for her notebook. Kevin whirled around and backhanded her hard, then slapping her again knocking her unconscious. When I came to Kevin was standing over me with a look of rage and I knew Nick was right. I have to get out of here fast. I have to get some where safe, Mulder! I have to get to Mulder, CJ thought as she started to rise. Kevin grabbed her by the hair, making her look at him. "He's not a part of your life anymore. Forget about him. Your mine and the sooner you realize it the better." He growled, slapping her again, and throwing her to the ground. She gasped in pain as she rose to her feet. He slammed her against the wall throwing her journal at her full force. It hit her hard in the chest, taking her breath away, as he stormed out of the apartment. CJ quickly dialed Nick on her cell phone as she hurried down the street. "Nick?" CJ sobbed into the phone "Oh my god what happened? CJ?" "You were right, you were right about him the whole time. I'm sorry I didn't listen I'm sorry . . ." "Oh God what did he do? CJ? What he do?" "He beat me up cause I wouldn't let him read my journal." "Jeez where are you now? I'll pick you up." "I'm going where I feel safe." "Ok I'll meet you there in 15 minutes." Mulder's apartment She knocked on Mulder's door and prayed he was home. He answered the door and CJ started at his appearance. He wasn't as clean cut as the last time she saw him. Stubble covered his chin, his eyes were blood shot, his hair was long and shaggy, he looked like he'd lost a lot of weight, he was grotesquely gaunt and ethereal. His eyes widened with surprise to see her and he smiled. "CJ" he said softly as she hurried in "Anyone else here?" she asked quickly. "Sky, but he's busy with Van if you know what I mean. CJ? You look nervous what . . ." she turned to look at him and he gasped. "Oh my god CJ what happened?" Mulder said in shock, gently touching her cheek, she flinched in pain. "Kevin . . ." "Did he do this? Did he do this to you? He hurt you? Oh I'm going to kill him! Oh baby come here." He said pulling her to him, she fell into his arms quickly, hugging him tightly. "You need to go to the ER honey. Make sure everything's ok." "I will, I have Nick meeting me here." "Ok, " Mulder said lifting her face gently, looking at the bruises forming on her face. He chewed his bottom lip concerned. "Oh CJ I'm so sorry, I would never hurt you like this you know that." "That's why I came here. I feel safe here Mulder." Mulder smiled and sighed heavily "Yeah you feel safe at your friends house." "I'm sorry Mulder, I'm sorry I wasn't strong enough to fight for what I wanted. I hope its not too late to come back." "Never I told you before, there is no one else I want. I was watching you, watching over you. Skyler said pestering you wouldn't work this time." "He's a wise man. I needed to come back on my own." "I know, and I love you CJ." "I know Mulder, I know." She said as she held him tighter. 4 weeks later "It's been four weeks since the Kevin incident and Mulder and I have fallen back into our old routine. For awhile Kevin called trying to apologize, but he hasn't called since Mulder answered the phone. Hopefully he's backing off. Mulder still wants me to move in with him, but now I'm seriously considering it. We seem closer now, I love him more than I ever thought possible, the difference is amazing." CJ wrote into her journal as she rolled on her stomach on Mulder's bed. "Hey CJ, here you go." He said, handing her a glass of iced tea. "I gotta go to the club tonight, coming?" he said sitting next to her on his bed and running his fingers up and down her back lightly. "No I have an early class tomorrow then I'm taking them to the museum." "Ok love you." He said kissing her on the temple lightly. "Are you going to be here when I get back?" he asked hopefully before he left. "Yeah I'll be here." He smiled brightly and waved as he closed the door. 2:30 a.m. Mulder watched the crowd dancing to the music and smiled as he started over to Skyler. "Hey Sky . . ." he started only to stop when he felt a sharp pain in his back and rip up. Mulder turned and locked eyes with Kevin as he raised the knife and stabbed him in the chest, quickly slashing him across the stomach. Mulder stumbled back in shock. Shrieks of horror abounded as Mulder fell to the ground. Skyler screamed for security and went to Mulder's side as they took Kevin down. "She's mine! I can't have her neither will you." Kevin growled as he was cuffed. "Call an ambulance.! Mulder, Mulder hang on. Mulder?" Skyler asked as Mulder coughed up blood. Mulder nodded slowly, blood filling his mouth again as he blacked out. OR waiting room CJ ran up to Skyler hugging him tightly. "How you holding up? Have you called his mom?" she asked quickly "Yeah she's taking the first flight out tomorrow morning." "Who would do this to him?" "Your ex." He said sharply "KEVIN?!" "Yep, he said if he couldn't have you Mulder wasn't going to either." "Oh god." "He slashed him down his back, stabbed him in the chest and sliced along his stomach. Gutted him like a pig he was holding his intestines in his hands. It was . . ." Skyler stopped, choked with emotion. CJ hugged him again, steeling herself. Come on CJ be strong, one of us has to be in control. "Mr. Wilson?" a doctor asked as he came out of the OR "Yes?" "He's out of surgery now. Who's this?" "I'm Mulder's girlfriend Colton Ritter." "Ms. Ritter, your boyfriend has sustained serious injuries to his pericardial and abdominal regions. He lost a lot of blood, we're hoping he hasn't bled anywhere else. The wound on his back tore most of the skeletal muscles so we put him in a immobilizing cast till it heals. "But he's ok? He'll be alright?" "In time, we're watching to make sure he doesn't get an infection. Depending on how he does, he'll be able to leave next week." "Thank you, can I see him now?" Going into see Mulder, I saw how fragile he was, how precious, how much I would have lost if he was gone. "Mulder?" He didn't move, must be asleep she thought as she petted his shaggy hair. He really needs a haircut. He didn't take care of himself while I was gone, didn't eat like he should have, couldn't sleep. He looked so tired like something was missing when I saw him that day. I know now what was missing was me. Mulder stirred, his eyes snapping open, and he gasped. "You ok?" Mulder turned to her quickly and nodded, smiling "Hey baby." "Hey Shaggy." CJ said ruffling his hair. "I meant to get a haircut before I was stabbed." He kidded, coughing and wincing from the pain. "Here, this is for your Demerol." CJ said handing him the trigger to his Demerol pump. "Thanks, guess Sky'll want metal detectors now." "Probably, I'm sorry I feel like this is my fault." "No it's not baby. You didn't know he was that nutso. I want to hold you." He said reaching for her with his good arm. CJ placed her head gently on his chest as he wrapped his arm around her and sighed. "Yes Mulder." "Yes what?" Mulder asked, confused. "I'll move in with you." "Really?!" "Yeah one question though, can Nick come too?"