Poetry is the human way to deal with emotional trauma... some of my poetry
causes
emotional trauma.
Page II
With This Rose
With this rose
I offer up my feelings for you...
As I gaze into your eyes
The world is a wonderful place to be...
The sparkle in your eyes
Puts a new sparkle in mine,
And your love for me refreshes my soul
And I know that all is now okay...
The heavy smell of incense
The candlelight flickers
So lost in the music
So comfortable in your arms...
Run your dainty fingers through my long hair
Show me how much you love me in your gentle ways
Your soft voice... your eyes...
I would give the world to be with you--
And how do you know that I haven't already...
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
October 09, 2000
Miss You
If ever I am in your arms again
We could both be happy
You would feel my love for you
Because I would never hurt you again...
Over 90 days without you
Sentence served
Time done....
I saw you tonight
For the first time since....
No smile could crawl upon my weary face
I held fast to my composure
I did not want you to see me in pain...
You spoke of coming back
You looked down when I spoke of how you left me
All alone and empty... without a word...
Have my love
Have my dreams
Have my everything....
I am here for you
I shall die without your love and touch
For I love you that much...
I never meant to hurt you
I never meant the things I callously said...
If you love me, then let me know
If you don't.... then let me go
An early grave
A happy ending to it all...
Keep your piercings
Your wild-eyed looks...
I love your art
I love your ways...
If you love me
Then come kiss me
If you don't
Then hand this poem back to me...
In a million pieces....
Life is short and I die fast
Spiritual depression and strife
I need to love you
I need to give you my life....
Take it from me
I offer my heart on a silver platter....
Without you
Nothing will ever matter....
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
October 21, 2000
To Nikki
My Words Are Empty
Now I lay me down to sleep
I pray to God my soul to take
If I shall live another day
I shall cry when I wake...
Why am I kept alive
So against my will
Only to feel the pain
Of a million lifetimes
A million suffering souls
Only to miss what I once had....
Why do you not let me die within my sleep
Dreaming a fine dream
One of happiness and Christmas
One of snow and cookies
Why does the sadness prevail...
Why must all thoughts be of pain
Why must I suffer in missing them
Why can I not go forth
Why am I not okay all alone?
Desperately dying to be myself
No one will have me this way
No one as demented and twisted as I...
Is this such a funny joke in your mind?
I fear more as I get older
I have never accomplished anything of importance
Except to feel the pain-- the pain of loss
An exceptional mind destroyed by psychosis
I simply do not see the humour in it all....
Is there no release from this pain
Is there no end to the sadness.........
I want to live damn it!
I want to love damn it!
I want to cry myself into a dream
And never wake from the beauty
To once again know the pain...
Why do you hate me so?
Allow me to die....
I want the pain to go away
I want to be free of the pain
I want to love
I want to live
I do not need this pain
Every moment of everyday day
It is destroying me....
I do not need this pain
I want the pain to go away
I want to love....
I want to live.........
But if the pain does not go away
I want to die...
I do not want to die...
So lonely inside
God
Why?
Take this pain please
Please
I beg of you
Do you want me to die, God?
I think you have a sick sense of humour, God....
You created me to amuse you
You want to watch me die....
But I want to live!
I want to love!
I want to feel....
You win
I want to die....
Because the pain will not go away.....
What did I do to deserve this?
The snow falls gently and quietly...
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
October 22, 2000
Green Wings of Crystal
She came unto me
With green wings of crystal--
Tell me who you really are she said
I should not I answered
Then show me your soul she begged
I cannot I growled....
I love you she cried
You cannot love that which you do not understand
Nor will accept I stated--
Prove your love for me
--She could not--
She looked me in the eyes
And pushed--
I want to know you she begged
She pushed too hard too fast too soon
Then I shall show you I darkly muttered--
I took off my lit mask
I tore down the wall that protected all from me
The evil within my soul was apparent and overbearing--
Her green wings cracked into a million shards
Each shard slicing her soul to ribbons
To her grave she fell...
I replaced the mask of lies
Restrained myself again to my self-made prison
My soul once again hidden to protect all
I quietly swept the pieces of crystal away...
She came unto me begging for my love
But her soul was weak and could not prove her love
I showed her what she wanted to see
All of the evil within my heart...
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
October 25, 2000
To Lauren
Tweak
Tweak tweak
Numb
Beware the quiet one
Soft spoken
Shivering
Inside is broken
Can you hear me
Calling you to save me
My wings will not open
As I spiral into the abyss...
Deep dark and dank
Numb
No animosity left to defend
Hostile no longer
Inside is broken
My wings will not open
Nothing to say
That I've said before
Tweak phreak
Numb
Feelings are gone
All hope is dead
That stirs inside
Silence on my lips
Realizing words mean nothing
The world is lonely
I'll save my breath
'Cause it will not change a thing
Beware the quiet one
Actions are louder than words
My eyes do not betray me
Silence is deadly...
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
November 22, 2000
Self Worth
While you sit around dreaming
I lay around giving up
All that truly matters is the end of time
Your paranoia bores me...
I want to hug you
I want to hold you
I want to kiss you
I do not wish to chase your ghosts...
I will not contend
I will not fight for your love
Your games grow cold
I have won them all before.
Your pretentious delusions
Destroy me....
Your extreme over-estimated self-worth
Makes me laugh so hard inside....
The barren wastelands hold the answer
Sweet emptyness
Memories of yore
When nothing meant something
And something meant all
And things were happy
The fascination of a newborn child was upon me
The world was different
I was happy....
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
Feb. 8, 2001
Languorous
Do you know the languor
The part of your soul that cries
In the hollow of the night
A little bit of your heart dies
Apathy is not a symptom
It has become your disease
Your eyes are beautiful
Now your heart is empty
Emotional torpor
What once was
Is no longer
That which was once resilient
Now lays dormant and bleeding
Indifference is not your truth
Your hardened face hides
The emotional chaos
That destroys your soul.
Rev. Lord Dellamorté
Feb. 11, 2001
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